LOOT Sunset Yacht Update
by BONZO, HSM guest contributor
Developers in Home occasionally update existing spaces with new features. Lockwood recently updated the Dream Yacht and the Arctic Voyage with wildlife, and the Dream Island with diurnal control. It’s great to see updates to existing spaces, but a new update from LOOT Entertainment on their Sunset Yacht may send shivers down your spine.
This personal space, which has been around for some time, is no stranger to periodic updates. It also saw an update with wildlife before, and this new update pits you against an unassailable foe; you must defend the one wildlife feature which probably sold you on it to begin with. A whaling ship has caught wind of your privately owned segment of the seas, and the whale which occupies it — and they are coming for it.
Why would LOOT create this update? Unfortunately, LOOT is obligated by corporate decisions which are often influenced by the need for commercial gains. The fishing industry has lobbied multiple media sources to push their agenda and to cultivate a more friendly image for themselves in light of the popularity of the anti-whaling efforts of the Sea Shepherds Society and documentaries like The Cove, Black Fish, and Whale Wars.
While LOOT has attempted to find a diplomatic solution to the problem to keep Home users sheltered from these political battles, the influence of the fishing industries has essentially forced LOOT to include this update to advocate for the alleged scientific research the whaling vessels claim to engage in. After being demonized by environmentalists, the fishing industry is looking for ways to market a better image for themselves, and somehow feels if it becomes more commonplace even in virtual seas their tainted image may be improved.
But there is one thing which they did not count on. The tree-huggers at LOOT met their legal requirement to the lobbyists, but in support of the Home users who truly love their personal space’s wildlife elements, LOOT has included a mini-game to defend your whale.
In order to not advocate for dangerous and illegal assaults against a whaling vessel, you can only fire fireworks to distract the ship, and use a fog machine to send clouds of smoke to hide your whale. Armed only with a cannon, you must fire dazzling displays of fabulous pyrotechnic explosions in the air above the whaling ship — at a safe distance, of course — as well as navigate the yacht at close range to your whale while the smoke machine hides the poor creature in synthetic fog.
Will this be enough to deter the whaling vessel? Probably not, but you can do your best to keep your whale alive and away from these commercial fishing poachers claiming to do legitimate scientific research by studying the stomach contents of thousands of whales in the southern seas while taking advantage of a loophole which allows them to kill whales for scientific purposes and then allows them to sell the remaining meat. If not, well you’ll have to bear witness to the harpooning of your whale and the reddening of the waters as it struggles for its life and you are irreparably psychologically scarred.
At least if you fail, you are rewarded with a virtual legal note from the whaling vessel which indicates a level of gratitude for your contribution to bogus research. You earn a wall-hanging item which can be placed in any personal space in Home, as a reminder of the whale you used to have. You’ll miss your whale, but maybe you’ll feel better about the whaling ships, and their public relations campaign will have worked.
LOOT has included a little extra: after poaching your whale, the whaling vessel returns to poach your sharks and dolphins too, and if you fail to defend them as well you will end up with no wildlife left in your personal space. If you are fond of the wildlife in the Sunset Yacht, then fight for their lives to keep them, but you know…no pressure. If your personal space ends up with no wildlife at all, it will just be a virtual representation of the future outcome of the real life seas after the ecosystem is decimated as a result of mankind’s irresponsible depletion of natural resources.
April 1st, 2014 by BONZO | 4 comments
BONZO is an editor and artist for HomeStation Magazine.
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Bonzo…
That was genius!
Can we also play as the captain of the whaling vessel?
Saving the oceans is just so overrated.
You will lose ur animals? o.O might i point out that we PAID for the whale… Im sure others wont be happy to lose sumthing they paid for.
It’s rather obviously an April Fools Day article.
Kudos to BONZO for writing a hilarious story!