A Virtual Companion Cautionary Tale
by ted2112, HSM team writer
Sometimes meeting new people is great, but what happens after the novelty wears off?
I meet these three ladies on Home about a month ago: Amber, Keiko and Lux. I must admit I was a bit enamored. Who wouldn’t be? They followed me around, showering me with compliments about everything from my taste in decorating to my personal good looks and sex appeal. They were easy to hang out with, not very demanding with my time or attention. They were content just hanging out and practicing their dance moves. They didn’t eat all my food in my virtual fridge or run up my phone bill or bogart my bandwidth and it was kind of nice to log on and be told how wonderful I am. When all three of them were hanging out it was like a nonstop parade of ego-fortifying rhetoric and at first made me feel like a virtual god, but then I guess it started to wear a bit thin.
I think it started with Amber. As much as I dig the schoolgirl outfit thing, it was all she had to wear. When I had guests over I had to hide her in some remote corner of my personal space and hope she didn’t find her way back. That could have been embarrassing, especially if she decided to do her stripper dance routine. It became clear that Amber and other friends didn’t mix, so I set her up at my Tycoon Penthouse. It’s got a great view and I never go there anymore. She can tell the other buildings how sexy they are and put on her show for the whole city.
With Keiko it was different. She was funny and nice, but then I discovered she was like that with everyone. All those compliments that made me feel so good fell flat when I realized she said the exact thing to everyone. I wasn’t special at all! After a while I just couldn’t bear to be around her any more, and every time she told me how good I looked I just cringed. I finally got up enough nerve to send her packing, and put her on a nonstop flight to my inventory storage. If she gets hungry, there are lots of food items left over from last year’s Thanksgiving quest in Pier Park.
Lux hung out with me a little while longer. She’s kind of into her own thing, but ultimately it’s difficult to establish a relationship with someone if you can’t take them anywhere. Lux and I never hung out outside my personal space. One time I was talking to her about the new Home update and public spaces and she didn’t have a clue what I was talking about. It dawned on me that Lux lived in her own world, blissfully unaware of the changing Home landscape happening all around her.
I tried an intervention with VICKIE from Sodium and the Juggernaut Mini Bots, but Lux just couldn’t understand that there was a world outside the doors of the personal space. Sometimes relationships have sad endings, and as quirky cool as Lux was, we had to go our separate ways. She is receiving the finest care virtual money can buy and I hope some day things will be different.
Relationships can be difficult at best sometimes, and if I learned anything from my time with the three ladies from nDreams, is that sometimes it’s best to take things slow. Maybe moving in with all three of them at once wasn’t the best idea and it may have been wise to get to know them a while longer. I have heard from my Thing in a Box in my storage that he has met this blue haired girl who thinks he’s the best. Also, I am running into hot water with my neighbors of my Tycoon Penthouse about the lewd public displays going on there, so I may have to move Amber to a more secluded location.
This is my story; call it a cautionary tale if you will, but when I found the three in the store that day I wasn’t quite prepared for how much they would turn my virtual world upside down. I am now keeping things low key and slow and have just bought the orange tabby kitten companion. I think this is a much better fit.
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LOL Ted!!! That was a fun read as always.
OMG this was funny!
You sense of humor some times is so dead pan that it’s not until the middle of the article you realize it’s a joke. Inspired my Kurt Vonnagut indeed.
Thanks for the companion advice. I have a troublesome tiger I got as a gift in Palace of the seven winds!
Very funny!! I encountered these 3 ladies when I visited and one of them gave me a great ego boost too! I think she was saying different things to me than she was saying to you!!! Thanks for the good laugh!!!
Heh heh. Fun read Ted, but, I’ve been told on two separate occasions that LUX is gay…
Jus sayin’ X )
Mine aint as smart as yours Ted. I got the Amber model and sometimes she just walks into walls or gravitates in one area. And wow she feels that way about you too, I thought it was just me she felt all those ways about. I guess she is two timing us, when shes not with me, shes with you. Oh well, they are fun and can get in the way a lil’, though I haven’t yet relegated her to the trash…uh I mean storage bin just yet, oh and…hands off my Amber! Great write Ted.
What fun! I enjoyed it immensely.