Why We Keep Coming Back
by Femaelstrom, HSM guest contributor
The other day I logged into Home, and as the load screens scrolled by, I began to contemplate the world we ‘live’ in. I rolled the thought around in my head of how important this place we call “Home” had become to me, and considered the many reasons why it is I keep coming back. The reasons may seem obvious, but for me, the reasons are few, but important and profound.
It started on a slow Saturday night, in the days before the Hub. I was dressed as General Rahm Kota, from Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, and decided to visit the Star Wars Creature Cantina. I walked around the place and did what I do best when I have no real plan in mind:
Watch the locals.
I saw a cast of characters that was quite dynamic. A gaggle of Boba Fetts stood by the bar, and a set of clone troopers stood by an arch. Speech bubbles inflated and deflated with awesome speed. Admittedly I stood close to a few interesting conversations to just — well, let’s be frank — eavesdrop. The patrons were for the most part a lively and nice group of people, with the exception of a few individuals running around and dancing in front of others, begging for recruits for their various fams.
The dance floor was crowded. There were people with glow sticks and lightsabers performing various dances, and countless text bubbles bobbing up and down. Most of the seats were taken, so I parked myself at the bar and simply looked around. The ante room was aglow with a running video, though the rest of the room was generally pretty dark.
As I stood there, I contemplated my existstence in this place that was so new to me, called Home. I had gained around four friends at this point, and it was rare to speak with them, so my general thought was that if I left home permanently, nobody would have noticed my coming or going. Home for this “newb” had become a place I did not fit into. I, being a basically shy person, wasn’t sure how to navigate the new waters, and there wasn’t anybody to help me as I have helped others who are new to our world.
Side note: I have had the pleasure of helping new people enter the realm we love so dearly. I offer advice and direction to people who have none in regards to this realm. I try to do a kindness to people, in order to help them not be like I was: overwhelmed and unsure of what I had just stepped into. It’s a real joy to see the relief in their words when they realize somebody has been kind enough to help a new stranger. I know if that had happened to me, it would have made some understandings far easier. I believe this should be a communal goal of those of us who love Home.
I decided to do one more pass of the cantina before logging off for the night, and perhaps for good. That was the best thing I ever did.
As I approached the dance floor for this other pass, I spotted a blonde woman simply standing alone, wearing a Burn Zombie Burn t- shirt and jeans. Her name reflected her love of Lord of the Rings.
“You’re a LOTR fan, huh?” Despite the obvious hint of her name, these were my first words.
Her response was short and brief. “Yes.”
We spoke for several hours that night, and over the next couple of weeks we met many times. Now she is the single best friend I have on Home and can’t imagine the experience without her. We voice or text chat almost every night and find that we are the first person we seek out when we arrive in this wonderland.
That moment we met was pivotal to my staying. It encouraged me to continue my search for friends and to delve ever deeper into this realm and see what it has to truly offer.
What it offered was so vast an experience that it’s almost impossible to quantify. Where I once only had four friends, I am now somewhere over fifty. The Tolkien blonde is still there,and our bond is ever closer. At the risk of sounding boastful, I own a nice compliment of personal spaces, and a great quantity of clothes and housing items to spend a lot of time tinkering with (yes, I’m aware there are people in Home who have far more than I do). With each day the experience becomes more and more exciting. There’s always someplace to go and explore, regardless if it was there before or after the hub’s advent. There are always seasoned veterans and those new to Home to meet.
The people that are (or were) my friends have made all this more impossible to leave. I know these people, beyond the avatars. I have come to know of the difficulties they face personally in their private lives. I know the job losses, the illnesses, and the sadness. I also know the joys and the happiness that they have too. Recently a dear friend of mine got ‘married’ in Home and is intending to do so in the real world with the same gentleman.
What is the point of this story, you ask?
This thing we call “Home” is truly a fascinating place, because unlike anything else in the gaming world, we are dealing with real people directly. This is not a game where we shoot them, Call of Duty style, in which we may never know the person beyond statistics or a gamer I.D. tag. In Home, we grow close to them; learn their emails, birthdays, faces, personalities, phone numbers and so forth. We grow with these people, they like us and we like them, and in my case I want to hear from all my friends all the time.
I generally equate Home to outsiders as The Sims, except that there are real people on the other end. They are real people with real feelings and real lives. I have come to care deeply and dearly for all the people I have as friends, and am sad about the ones that used to be. These people we come to know as mech robots, or grim reapers, fashionistas, soldiers, b’loon people or Boba Fetts or what ever interesting combinations you can find, are the real value of exploring this world. My friend, the Tolkien fan, means the world to me — not just the virtual world but the real world.
Beyond the prizes, the freebies or the games, beyond the unique locations and lavish environments, beyond the anonymous freedoms afforded by our avatars, beyond anything we see or do in home, I believe that the real walkaway value is simply one thing. No matter what we dress like, or create our image to look like. No matter what you gain or mass, how small or large your footprint here is, the people are the real gain here. That Friend Request is the is the real freebie. It is these connections that bring us back day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year.
March 22nd, 2012 by FEMAELSTROM | 7 comments
FEMAELSTROM came to Home in June 2011 and never wanted to leave, even at weekly maintenance when he usually gets booted. The sand box environment appeals to the explorer in him and often is out and about as he ‘geeks’ out dressed like some sort of sci-fi character, while he people watches in popular public spaces. An artist and writer, FEMAELSTROM loves making friends and meeting people. He loves sci-fi and decorating Home estates and loves to respond “here” when people ask “where are you from?” in public places.
Great article Fem! Glad you to have you.
One word changed your life. That word was “Yes.” Had your friend ignored you or else had been in another room and not seen your question, your life might have been drastically different. It amazes me the simple things we say and do, the roads we choose to take, how they influence our lives. Sometimes in good ways but sadly sometimes not.
Well written article to my way of thinking.
Bye, and good luck.
Finally, Strom! After talking with you on several occasions, I knew your eloquence would translate well into the written word. Now you know where HSM is and how to use the submit button. We need to hear a lot more from you.
I am glad you have decided to include me among your friends in recent times and that you have joined us here at the magazine. This was a wonderful, heart felt article. Good to hear your literary voice at last.
Thank you all, I am so happy to be part of this community, and it’s people like you that make this such a great place.
Thanks for telling us your story. I never tire of hearing about what Home means to people and why they are compelled to return.