HomeStation Presents: Caption This Picture #1
by Olivia_Allin, HSM team writer and photographer
Our avatars do the goofiest things sometimes, don’t they? As HomeStation’s photographer, I’m usually out on assignment, picking up images for various articles in development. Sometimes you have the luxury of posing everyone just right and having the perfect lighting and the perfect setting; other times, you’re scrambling against everything the laws of entropy can throw at you, and it’s all you can do to just throw up the viewfinder and hope for the best.
In the process of conducting a photo shoot, you’re undoubtedly going to have a lot of images left over in your hunt for just the right one. So what happens with those leftovers?
Most of the time, they’re usually just filed away or deleted. We’re photographing artificial images, after all, and Home loses some of its magic when it’s reduced to a static image. Sometimes, however, you end up with a leftover image that’s just so wacky or different that you can’t help but stare at it. So we decided to do something with those images.
As a new venture, HomeStation is going to run “caption this picture” articles from time to time. HSM tends to be a very serious publication which prides itself on a level of journalistic depth that’s redefined how people look at this virtual reality we all inhabit. That said, it doesn’t mean we can’t cut loose and have some fun once in a while! And it is thus with a bit more lighthearted spirit that we bring to you this new segment.
Our first victims: HSM’s intrepid editors, NorseGamer and Terra_Cide! I mean, heck, if we can’t lampoon these two, who can we go after?
Caption this pic!
Make sure to keep the captions clean and within a reasonable-person standard of good taste. HSM, like Home itself, is a mildly PG-13 environment — so don’t be a doorknob and post a caption which you know is going to result in deletion and banhammer. Let’s have fun with this!
If you have a Home picture which you think is ripe for captioning, contact us. And who knows? If someone writes a really classic caption, it might just show up in a future HomeStation magazine issue…
December 12th, 2011 by Olivia_Allin | 34 comments
Olivia_Allin is a team writer, photographer, model, curator, graphic artist, researcher and comic relief for HomeStation Magazine; she lives in Texas with her boyfriend, and Home is more than just a game to her. Years ago she discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. On weekends, to let off steam, she participate in full-contact origami. She saw a Bigfoot once, made a sound you never want to hear twice, and was so proud of her Special Olympics gold medal that she had it bronzed. She is, in her own words, adorkable.
There’s a lot of creeps in here hittin’ on you, but I am not a creep.
Terra sees your attempt at looking strapping. Terra is amused.
“I said 10 paces behind me silly man, I can still smell your Axe Body Spray. You are a nice guy but you make my eyes burn.”
Axe Body Spray, official scent of Home stalkers.
“I know what you’re thinking. And I know where you’re looking. I just want you to know -- I’m armed.”
“Looks likes she’s about to pass out soon….better make my move! Giggity!
Back off. I’m a dude!
THIS WEEK ONLY “GEORGE MICHAEL AND CELINE DION” sing
“WHERE HAVE ALL THE HAS BEENS GONE”
He reacts with a startled, frightened look when she says to him with nonchalant confidence, “It’s over. It’s a quick acting poison.”
On this week’s episode of “Miami Vice” Don Johnson busts random criminal #6 for fashion crimes against all humanity.
“OMG! Look at the effect she has on him. IT’S STANDING STRAIGHT UP!!!” (I am, of course, referring to his hair-do).
“She can’t resist my debonair looks and suave dance moves, I am in like Flynn!”
“Does he really think I am that easy? This one will need special training.”
Is there life after death? Hit on this female avatar and find out!
“. . . and that’s how Norslings are born, now shut up and go to bed.”
” If you want some of this, you will have to stop huffing the fumes from your corvette exhaust!”
“..hey baby..wanna take a ride in my spaceship?? I’m from another planet…:
“.. at least we are color coordinated
*thought balloon* I wonder how long before the cranberry juice, vodka and roofie cocktail will kick in.
Norse: “HoHo” Terra” “Ho Hum”
NorseGamer: “Hey! What are you doing in my office?”
Terra_Cide: “You’re officially out Norsy! At last I’m taking over HSM, so say goodbye to your Corvette…”
“…Norse..did you forget to use your Dapper Dan and hairnet last night?”
Norse ” oh yeah! she’s digging me!
Terra” (looking somewhat occupied)Did I remember to turn the stove off before I left?…Oh Geez!! it’s his Lordship Norse Noobius…I wonder what he wants!!!!”
“This here’s the legendary Human Editor, frolicking in her native habitat! She is one of the deadlier creatures known to man. One crack of her whip and we’re done for! Let’s touch it.”
Otherwise known as: Norse Iwrin’s last words.
Crikey,lol.
Oh look at him pretending to be something he’s not……( oops I can’t forget to put on the happy face….)
“These guys are cool -- for a bunch of mimes”
-- OR --
“Is this like an Irish Spring Commercial?”
“A might bit stronger than I care to be!”
-- OR --
“He’s got a hair stiffie!”
NG: “No, really, vests are going to come back in style.”
TC: “Call me when they do.”
(I actually do have a collection of waistcoats, sadly. Should I even be admitting to this…?)
They probably look quite good with your watch fob, cravat, and plus fours.
Where’s the “like” button for this?
Norse: You don’t just get hair like this with the click of a button…oh wait…nevermind.
Jers don’t look at me like that or I’ll deflate your wheels
NG-…good,now just close your eyes,fall backwards and I PROMISE I’ll catch you this time.
“hey sugar,wanna take a spin in my corvette targa to olive garden?
Norsegamer:”So is it a date?”
Terra”I told you not until you pass all 3 sections of the AXE quiz!”