This isn't a "war on Christmas" but instead a humble suggestion. This year find out what it's like to be Jewish. Toss aside the Christmas traditions. Don't have a tree with an endless base of gifts. And most importantly, don't leave Santa any cookies. Seriously, the guy has been trying to go on a diet for years, but you all keep acting like enablers and leaving him delicious and fattening chocolate chip cookies. Call your closest Jewish friend (come on, you know you have one) and spend the holiday with them. You'll enjoy some P.F. Chang's and catch a movie or two. Sounds good, right? Surely that beats the option of getting a massive amount of presents.... right? On second thought, as good as P.F. Chang's may be, it sounds like this whole Christmas gig is the better deal. No offense to your Jewish buddy, but we're betting the whole being showered with presents experience is a little better. However, there are some fictional Jews who would be a blast to hang out with on Christmas...
