True Blood's Sexiest Moments

Episode: "9 Crimes"

It's one thing for a woman to have the ideal and romantic supernatural fantasy of a man floating into the windows, and entering her bedroom. It's another thing when the fantasy belongs to some 1200 year old monster, already distracted by the stripper in front of him! 

But when you put Anna Paquin in lingerie, it's hard to focus on anything else.

Between Pam, Nan Flanagan and Queen Sophie-Anne, it turns out that a great deal of vampires prefer to partake in the same sex. Particularly among lady-vampires, the inner thighs and femoral artery seem to be the most appropriate for getting the blood flowing, in more ways than one. 

Of course for Pam it's always party-time, and we've lost count of how many men or women she's had back to the private office of Fangtasia for a little nibble.

Episode: "Me and the Devil"

Honestly, does it even matter what circumstances manage to put Deborah Ann Woll in lingerie? Be they a tornado or a hallucination of Jason's after she uses her blood to heal him from the were-panther bites?

And regardless of whether or not this dirty and soap opera-esque development continues, we're glad to have known it.

Episode: "Night On The Sun"

What? We here at UGO have always been equal opportunity, and one has to admit that despite the lack of fang-banging babes, plenty of fangirls (and surely some fanboys alike) squeal at the notion of Alexander Skarsgard taking on another man, particularly the arrogant Talbot.

Episode: "Never Let Me Go"

We've all had that fantasy of the good Christian girl being opened up to her naughty side, as repression does wonders for the sex drive. While the uber-Christian soldier of the sun Sarah was bound to open up to Jason a bit, did you ever thing she'd leave her husband for him, or stoop so low as to give him a hand beneath the water? 

Gotta practice gripping those stakes somehow...

Episode: "Nothing But The Blood"

Hey, older women are hot. Even with all the ridiculous Bacchanalian orgies Mary Ann tended to throw, there's nothing like the sinful innocence of one's first time, as when a young Sam found solace in Mary Ann after attempting to steal items from her house. 

Episode: "Never Let Me Go"

Sure, she may have been a supernaturally evil shifter working for a demonic Maenad, but you've got to love the kinship of Sam finally meeting another shifter, particularly one who doesn't mind taking off her clothes for reasons other than transforming into a deer. 

And, for the record, we really feel for those using the pool table at Merlotte's after this.

Episode: "She's Not There"

Ah, arbitrary lesbian subplots. Is there nothing we can't rely on True Blood to bring us? Its newest ploy being to enrapture male attention (if a somewhat logical one) as we re-settle on our characters one year later to find Tara a lesbian cage fighter living in New Orleans.

Now just find a way to pair her with Pam, and we'll truly have scraped the bottle of the trashy barrel.

Episode: "Burning House of Love"

Ain't it always grand? Your girlfriend doesn't want to have regular sex, rather wanting you to trip b@lls as you do it by drinking V, and hallucinating flights through tropical landscapes. 

But granted this is one of the only places to see Lizzy Caplan nude, we can't think of a better way to experience the majesty known as V. Once it's legalized, of course.

Episode: "It Hurts Me Too"

Okay, now we've all explored the idea of hate-f$%king our exes, for however long it remains generally doable. It's one thing to slowly seek revenge, it's another to primally give in to the urge, even calling your current girlfriend to tell her after!

And even if you hate yourself enough to not want to make eye contact, to twist her neck to the point of being unable to make eye contact? Love hurts.