The Worst Of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia

You'd think the gang would eventually step in and try to get Charlie to stop huffing glue and spraypaint, but seeing as it's the fuel behind his epic musical "The Nightman Cometh" among other brilliant ideas, we can sort of see why they'd be hesitant to get him clean and sober. The first of the worst of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

When Dennis and Sweet Dee discover the joys of federal unemployment benefits (i.e. sitting on a stoop getting wasted while blasting Biz Markie... and "following their dreams") will eventually run out, they head down to the welfare office in the hopes of continuing to game the system. However, just to make certain their case is made, they take on the roles of some folks who really, really need the assistance... albeit totally unconvincingly.

Charlie's illiteracy has gone from bad (as seen here when he takes on the role of Dennis' speech writer) to worse ("writing" the entire script to "The Nightman Cometh" in hieroglyphics that only he can understand) to completely hopeless (his Dream Journal is basically a performance art piece in the making). Come on, guys. Help a brother out. Get him into some night classes, or at least get him a laptop so he can become a professional blogger.

After being the butt of the gang's horrible pranks and harboring an unrequited crush on Sweet Dee throughout high school, Matthew Mara's life is finally on track, becoming a Catholic Priest and putting his past behind him... until the gang, especially Dee, decide to revisit "Rickety Cricket" in the hopes he'll bless a urine stain on their wall that looks vaguely like the Virgin Mary. These days, Cricket plays the role of a local crackhead and has re-established himself as the butt of the gang's maliciousness.