I Want That on a T-Shirt: House Edition

People say funny things on TV all the time.  What if we took that stuff and put it on a t-shirt?  That's a multi-millionaire dollar industry right there.  We'd be Shamow and Snuggie-rich!  So, let's fire up the ole' silkscreen machine in the basement we used to print our crappy band's t-shirts with and make something worth wearing!

He's cranky, brilliant and if there was any justice in the world, he'd have a screenprinter following him around, writing down his every word. He's Dr. Gregory House and he's so prolific with his T-shirt ready quips that fans have taken to calling them "House-isms." We sifted through the thousands of biting remarks, and picked out some of the best to wear on your chest... At least before House has to rip it open to operate on you.

"If I was kidding I'd be dressed like you."

Sample conversation for this shirt: Person one says, "Are you kidding?" You whip off your sweater to reveal the above slogan T. Person one then rips off their sweater to reveal a slogan T that says, "Well at least I'm not wearing a slogan T." Person three enters with a shirt that says, "Oh snap!" End of scene.

"You're an idiot."

Perfect for participating in your local quiz bowl; or if you want to make anyone who starts to approach you sad, and have them walk away.

"It's not Lupus."

This is actually a great conversation starter, particularly if you have a disease which, on the surface, seems like Lupus. Saves a lot of time, too.

"Occam's Razor. The simplest explanation is almost always somebody screwed up."

Okay, this one might be slightly better as one of those anti-motivational posters, but if this was a shirt, there's no way of wearing it without doing a Z-snap in the air. Also, prepare to get punched in the junk for referencing Occam's Razor.

"That top makes you look like an Afghani prostitute."

My fondest hope is that we could make this top look like you're an Afghani prostitute and then its super ironic. Also, anyone have a photo reference for an Afghani prostitutes? Or a phone number? It's for this T-shirt article I'm writing. Cough.

So what's your favorite House quote medical mystery fans? And more importantly: when are we going to start "I Want That on a Walking Stick"?