True Blood's Best Merchandise

VILF! If you can't figure out what it stands for, I'm not going to help you. But one of the benefits of being acronym ignorant is getting to use your imagination! V can mean VHS, vagina, or voodoo: really, the world is yours here. Cop one of these aluminum water (or blooood?) bottles for $14.99.

You're better than a cheap-o action figure from the grocery store, ain't ya? Step your game up with this Sookie & Bill statue from DC Direct. Measuring up at over a foot tall, True: Love Sookie & Bill is made of hand-painted, cold-cast porcelain. Beware, though: some assembly is required. Provided that doesn't scare you off, you can nab it here for $195.

Your home bar could definitely benefit from more neon signage, no matter how many Bud and Corona signs you have up. You could do worse than a replica of the sign outside Merlotte's, Sam's Tru Blood-carrying, paranormal-attracting bar and grill. Judging by Sam's romantic history, you'll be bringing in plenty of exotic ladies who prefer to cavort in various states of undress and/or shapeshifting. Amazon's got it for $77.

This'll go perfectly with that Merlotte's neon sign. Just like the booze mirrors behind the bar at the corner joint your dad drank at after work instead of spending time with you, this Tru Blood mirror shills the fake red stuff. You can buy actual True Blood Tru Blood, though it tastes like blood orange instead of regular blood. Living solely on blood red orange juice soda liquid? No wonder vamps go rogue for the real stuff. Sounds delish, but not as a total food replacement. Get it for $48.99 from Big Bad Toy Store.