April 2012 American Way Magazine (2) - page 54

I ’
on a Saturday, andTimber Lanes is
in full swing. JimClemens, a regular
leaguebowlerhere forpractice, rolls
theday’sfirstballatprecisely10:23a.m.Heis
not,however,bowlingalone.Friendsout for
adaylongpubcrawlhave justarrived, sothe
bar ishopping,andevery lane issoontaken.
“It’s classic,” saysMike Ignatowski ashe
hoists theday’sfirstMillerLite. “It’sNorth
SideChicago.Wooden lanes. Youkeepyour
ownscore, soyoucancheatabit.”
OwnerBobKuhnbeams.
“It’s likehavingapartyatyourhouse,but
youdon’thave tocleanup,”saysKuhn,who
gothisfirstjobatabowlingalleywhenhewas
16andboughtthisplace in1985.
Thebuildingdates to theearly20thcen-
turyandhouseda speakeasyduringProhi-
bition. Laneswere installed in 1945, then
coveredwith lanesfromaJapanesebowling
centerduringarenovation in1978 thatalso
introduced amodern ball-return system,
usingundergroundtracks.Withthehelpofa
flashlight,youcanstillseetheoriginal lanes
andballtracks ifyoupeerthroughahatchat
thebottomof theball-returnmachines.
Thedecor isspartan, fromwood-paneled
wallsalong theeight lanes toapairof trees,
moretrunkthanbranch,paintedonthewall
abovethepins.
“Theyareprettysad-lookingtrees,”allows
Kuhn,who sayshehaskept them there for
27yearsoutofrespect forthepriorowners.
Kuhnsays thatwhileatone timehegave
directionsbytellingfolksthatTimberLanes
wastwomuggingsawayfromtheLtrain,the
neighborhoodhasgentrified,makingitsafer
tocomehere toplay.Kuhnsays
he’sbeeno˜eredmore than$2
millionfortheproperty,buthe’s
not interested inselling.
“We do very, verywell with
thebowlingalley,”hesays.
Kuhn knows his regular
bowlersbyname, askingabout
their friends and families andhow things
aregoingatworkas theyarrive.He’s an in-
valuableresourceforfolkslikeClemens,who
takeshisscoresheet toKuhn for totalingat
session’send.
“Ikept screwing itup,”Clemens says, “so
Igaveup.”
With no automatic scoring equipment,
bowlers are on the honor systemwhen it
comestopayingforgames,whichcosteither
$2.50or $3, depending onwhether you’re
bowlingonaslownightorduringpeakhours.
Kuhnsayshedoesn’tworryaboutcustomers
fibbing;thebar,notbowling,paysmostofthe
billsatTimberLanes.
“[If] a guywalks out of here and says he
beatmeoutofagame,doIcare?”Kuhnasks.
“He’sbeendrinkingthewholetime.”
The alley’s vital weak spot: nails show-
ing in someof the lanesowing towood that
hasdisappearedwithdecadesof
regular sanding. Kuhn says he
sands every threeyears andfig-
ures the laneshave three sand-
ingsleft.Andsoadecisionlooms.
“To put in regular wood, it
mightcost$40,000,”Kuhnsays.
“Idon’tknow. I’m56.”
TIMBER LANES
1851W. IRVINGPARKROAD,CHICAGO • (773)549-9770 • WWW.TIMBERLANESBOWL.COM
Thispage,bottom
left: Timber Lanes
ownerBobKuhn
Oppositepage:
HollerHouseowner
MarcySkowronski and
grandsonKrisStuckert,
aHollerHousefixture
58 APRIL 15, 2012 AA.COM/AMERICANWAY