How to Fix Them)

Okay, so, "How to Fix Them," huh?

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(Sounds kinda judgy, dont you think?) Seriously, tho, the idea that you can just, like, "fix" someone is, well, a little messed up. People aint broken appliances, ya know?

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You cant just grab a wrench and tighten a loose screw and bam! Problem solved.

I mean, I get it.

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We all have those friends or family members (or even partners, yikes) who do things that drive us absolutely bonkers. They might have habits that are annoying as all get out, or beliefs that make you wanna bang your head against a wall. And sometimes, okay, sometimes you genuinely see them making choices that are hurting themselves. You care about them, naturally, so you wanna help.

But heres the thing thats really important: you cant force anyone to change. (Trust me, Ive tried, it never works.) All you can really do is create an environment where they might choose to change themselves. And even then, its totally up to them.

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So, what does that environment even look like?

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Well, for starters, it means ditching the "I know better than you" attitude. Nobody likes being told what to do, especially when it comes from someone they already feel a little defensive around. Instead, try listening.

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Like, really listening. Ask questions, try to understand where theyre coming from, even if you disagree. Empathy goes a long way.

And, maybe, gently, gently, offer your perspective. But do it without judgment. Frame it as your own experience, not as some universal truth.

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Like, instead of saying "Youre wasting your life playing video games all day!", maybe try, "I used to spend a lot of time gaming, and I realized it was keeping me from doing other things I wanted to do.

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It might be different for you, but just wanted to share."

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See the difference?

Also, and this is a big one, focus on your own behavior. Are you being supportive?

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Are you being patient? Are you communicating clearly and respectfully?

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(Even when youre frustrated, which, lets be real, happens.) Sometimes, the best way to "fix" someone (and Im using that word loosely, like really loosely) is to work on yourself. Lead by example, ya know?

And finally, remember that some things just arent fixable. Some people are just… different.

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And thats okay.

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(It really is.) Sometimes, the best thing you can do is accept them for who they are, flaws and all.

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Maybe adjust your expectations, maybe create some healthy boundaries, but ultimately, let them live their own lives.

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Because, honestly, thats all any of us really want, right? To be accepted, even if were a little bit…screwed up.

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(Arent we all?)

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