This Weekly World News headline would go a long way towards explaining exactly what was wrong with the former Vice President. Cheney, a soulless corporate automaton, had numerous glitches in his programming and even violated Asimov’s First Law by shooting a human in the face on a hunting trip. And let’s not forget his myriad disappearances from the public eye, possibly for repairs of his servomotors. Thankfully, he has since been deactivated and can no longer plague mankind.