The man we know as Vermin Supreme has tried to win office before, but we're going to be honest in saying he doesn't have a snowball's chance in Hell. The dude wears a boot as a hat and carries an enormous toothbrush. His platform involves commanding every American to brush their damn teeth. Supreme is also the most pro-science of the candidates, insisting that government funding go to time travel research. And also giving every American a pony.
