Welcome to UGO's Flashback Friday, a new weekly column in which we'll be taking a look at a classic music video (thank you, YouTube) and talking a bit about why it's so historic, weird, cool, or unabashedly awesome. Since I'm writing this mofo for the time being, we're going to kick things off with one of my all-time personal favorites:
SCANDAL - 'THE WARRIOR'
It's the story of one man in a leotard and the woman who totally scratches him on the chest. Read more after the jump.
'The Warrior' was Scandal's biggest hit, and no expense was spared in creating the kind of post-apocalyptic, sci-fi, modern dance-infused epic that could stand out in 1984's crowded music video mob. We know we're in for fun right from the start, as Scandal singer Patty Smyth (not to be confused with Patti Smith) is scratched by some kind of leotard-wearing, puffy-haired guy who, it turns out, is the protagonist of the video. Puffy-haired guy then engages in a series of dance battle so involved as to give the stars of Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo pause. He fights with people wearing nets. He fights with a girl in frills and pink bows. He fights guys who rapell in on bungie cords. Why everybody's out to get him, we'll never know.
Ultimately, he has to face off against the final boss, Patti Smyth, who wields a +5 haircut of dexterity. A smirking guy in a referee costume appears, keeping score. Suddenly, instead of fighting, dancing guy and Patty Smyth are dancing together. And then Patty sings for the camera. I should point out, none of this is played for laughs.
What does it all mean? It's hard to say. It could be about a guy who's a total player until he meets the one woman ("The Warrior") who can tame his wild ways...or, not tame his wild ways, if you heed the lyrics of the song, which, by the way, kicks total '80s rock ass. Or, this could be a science-fiction story set in a far future, when all disputes are settled through interpretive dance. Either way, it looks like Andrew Lloyd Weber's Cats meets Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, and for that, I will always love it.
