Okay, if you're looking for a dude to cast as the lead vampire in your horror flick, don't go with the dude who was in Stepbrothers. And yet, here we are with Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant, a 2009 bomb that cast John C. Reilly as "Larten Crepsley," the undead leader of a traveling freakshow. This movie is a mess on so many levels that it's almost unfair to single Crepsley out, but just look at that ridiculous bastard. Seriously.
