Surprisingly, the creative minds behind The Karate Kid (director Harald Zwart, writer Christopher Murphey and producers Will & Jada Pinkett Smith) took a genuinely interesting approach to their remake of the 1984 original of the same name: this time, the kid moves to China.
Sounds like an innovative way to retell a story that, thanks to the power of nostalgia, has become a classic in the minds of 20 and 30-somethings everywhere, no?
Problem is, instead of embracing Chinese culture in any capacity, The Karate Kid opts for the Hollywood approach of taking a stereotypical dump on anything remotely foreign. Oh yes, we're in China! Better squeeze militant teachers, perfectionist students who excel at the violin and shots of the Great Wall of China in there!
The movie stars Jaden Smith (heir to the throne of Will) as Dre, an ignorant 12-year-old with a knack for pissing his mother, Chinese kids and me off. Unfortunately, that talent works to his disadvantage when his mother Sherri (Taraji P. Henson) relocates the two to China. Like Daniel-san before him, Dre has a tough time fitting in his with new surroundings - but it's kind of his own damn fault. The first forty-five minutes of this three-day-long film present Dre as a prick who can't get a break: he doesn't pick up after himself, he doesn't try and learn Chinese, he starts fights and obnoxiously hits on girls and, worst of all, blames his mother for ruining his life.
Dick.
After a third ass-kicking, maintenance man/kung fu master Mr. Han (Jackie Chan) steps in to school the mini-Fresh Prince in respect. Sadly, any hope Dre will "learn" has been completely lost at that point. It's up to training montages and discussion of ch'i to prove Dre is all grown up. Gone is "wax on, wax off" replaced by "jacket on, jacket off, hang jacket up," and temper tantrums by the boatload.
It's never a good sign when you're rooting for the douchebag nemesis to break both your lead's legs.
There is a silver lining to all this: Jackie Chan deserves something for his work (I'm not sure it's an Academy Award nom, but throw the man a Golden Globe!). Karate Kid is easily the best work he's done in years, throwing the audience a lifesaver from the sinking ship captained by rising star Jaden Smith. Watching Chan deliver a quiet, subtle performance that emotionally resonates at a pivotal moment late in the film is something we've never seen - and a breath of fresh air. No blooper reel at the end of this movie, folks.
Karate Kid is a snore and giant step backwards for the American perspective on China. Dre doesn't learn anything about this world, he fights through it. Somehow, after weeks of living in China, the kid never picks up a word of Chinese. How?! Oh, and it may have been smart to call it something other than The Karate Kid, since Jackie Chan explicitly states that they aren't learning karate.
The culturally-apologetic American in me can't overlook Karate Kid's infractions of ignorance, and I don't think Mr. Miyagi would either.
