My name is Jordan Hoffman and I am a Star Trek fanatic. Some days I wish I weren't, because being obsessed with Star Trek is a bit of a cliche. Would that I were, say, obsessed with Buckaroo Banzai or, hell, One Tree Hill. But I'm not. I am a large, bespeckled, asthmatic and mildly autistic (when it comes to alien taxonomies) nerd.
I've been to the Cons, I've seen every episode, I read the comics and have a plastic Ceti Eel on my desk.
So when I got a chance to speak with Alex Kurtzman and Roberto "Bob" Orci, screenwriters and producers of the new Trek reboot, I didn't let them off easy.
The nerd core breach begins below...
UGO: Hello Alex and Hello Bob. Is it Bob and Alex or is it Alex and Bob? Let's be honest.
A: We're interchangeable.
B: We go back and forth actually. We switch our names on every project.
UGO: Is that true?
B: Yeah.
UGO: That's awesome. So for Trek is it Orci-Kurtzman, or Kurtzman-Orci?
A: Uhh... where are we on that one?
B: I did get Trek actually.
A: Oh well I guess I'm getting Transformers then.
UGO: Is it that you have so many projects going, that you simply can't keep track?
A: It's a champagne problem, I suppose.
UGO: Touche, touche. Guys, I've been absolutely giddy about this project. It's the number one thing I think about when I wake up in the morning, after I kiss my wife. And the photos today have done nothing but lower my blood pressure because... because I'm worried, you know, this is not just a movie. This is Star Trek. And I know that you guys understand this. I know that you guys are the fans.
A: Indeed.
UGO: And I'm very pleased with what I saw today.
B: Oh, good.
UGO: You know, the photos that came out today, each one of them was tremendous. Obviously, the only disappointment was that I did not get to see Leonard Nimoy today, but hopefully that's coming soon.
B & A mumble affirmatively.
UGO: Awesome, Awesome.
So I have so many questions, that I don't know where I'm going to start. I know I'm not going to get anything specific about the plot out of you guys, but I just wanted to ask on the record real quick: Bob and Alex, you only can say one: What is your favorite Star Trek Episode? Let's start with Alex.
A: "Balance of Terror."
UGO (almost aghast): Really?
A: Mmmhhmmm.
UGO: Interesting. And Bob?
B: By the way, are you asking original series, or...
UGO: The whole shmear. Star Trek to me is one long continuum.
B: Fair enough. Alex your answer still stands, right?
A: Yeah my answer still stands. I have a close second but just take that for now.
UGO: I have 25 close seconds!, But you know... Bob what do you got?
B: I think I'd have to go for "Best of Both Worlds."
UGO: Wowwwww.
A: That's my close-second. So there we go. Part one or two, Bob?
UGO: Hey - it's all just one part. And "Family" is part three. It's all one show, man. You guys know this.
B & A laugh.
UGO: I saw in the photo on what I believe to be the bridge that Kirk's got a little bit of a shiner on him. Can we find out a little bit of how that happened?
A: Really, who could say?
UGO: Who could say? You could say!
B: What picture was that?
UGO: This is the picture where everybody except for Spock is on the bridge looking up at what I believe to be the viewscreen. Also, they're looking like they're seeing something monumental... a Romulan Warbird or something? I don't know.
B: You know, working in space is dangerous. You know?
A: You have objects that fly at you all over the place.
B: It's not exactly just a cruise ship, the Starship Enterprise.
UGO: Sure.
B: It's actually... uh... they're still all astronauts and the dangers of space are real.
UGO: OK. I'll buy that. I also noticed that their uniforms, it's very true to the original series, but I noticed there is some sort of new... I'll call it a polymer of some sort. There is some sort of space-protective agent. Is that to protect from some sort of element or the weather, or zero gravity?
B: I'd like to think that that's a whole area of research for the new era of fan fiction, hopefully. They can speculate exactly what kind of details these would be in 23rd century clothing?
UGO: OK.
B: Definitely the goal is to make it seem a mix of old and new.
UGO: Yeah, well that has been achieved. I know that has been the goal, and that has been achieved. Bob, you mention fan fiction, what is your favorite slash-fiction, what do you like to read most at night?
B: Uhh... government press releases are my favorite fiction.
UGO: No, SLASH-fiction, I said. SLASH fiction. Is it Kira/Dax? Is it...
B: OH!... uh... no comment.
UGO: No comment on that.
B: It might give things away.
UGO: I understand completely. I wanna just ask, I know we're gonna see a little bit of Caption Pike in this. Are we gonna see characters from The Cage when we meet Caption Pike? Or are you gonna stray from what was in The Cage? I know there was gonna be some deviation. From what we know as the "canon" and I'm ready to accept that. And those who can't accept that are gonna have problems.
B & A chuckle a bit.
UGO: That's fine, I mean, I can handle it. But when we meet Pike's crew, is the original Number One gonna be there? Is that space-age gee-whillekers kid gonna be there? Are we to see any of those characters again?
B: I gotta say that that's still part of the discovery process. It would be a disservice to you to comment on that.
UGO: Alright, alright. Fair enough. Let me ask you another question, about the character of Sarek who I know is going to appear in the film. We're going to meet Sarek and Amanda. And I've always wondered, and maybe you guys know the answer whether it's in the movie or not, did Sarek and Amanda engage in a koon-ut-kal-if-fee ceremony? Or not because she was an outlander, do you know the answer to this?
B: What can we tell you about this...
UGO: I know you're dying to get into this! I mean, I know you can't say much, and that's cool, but c'mon.
A: Well let me say this... let me say that one of the things that attracted all of us to covering some things that had never been covered in canon about Spock is his background. A lot of people don't know that his mother was human, and that his father was Vulcan. A lot of people that came to work on the movie, that was something they found out.
UGO stunned into silence.
A: We all know relatives that know basic things about Kirk and Spock, and that kind of seminal thing that was in Spock's background was invaluable. And Nimoy's involvement is a testament to the fact that there's continuity in that character. And you are going to get to see this rich character who was torn between two worlds. And his parents are torn in two worlds. And the pain that that caused their two families.
UGO: OK, I see where you're goin' with that. Um, I recently read that J.J. Abrams said that the movie would be no longer than 2 hours. Ya know, because a recent spate of movies had been 2 hrs 45 min, and he thought that that was too long. And of course a little part of me cried, because I want this movie to be 19 hours!! (Then of course I remember that if we go by the book, hours will seem like days.)
B & A do not laugh.
UGO: But that's another point. But I'm just wondering if you could comment on that. Is the running time gonna be a straight two hours?
A: Uh, we think it'll be under at this point.
B: Just a little though. It's basically a two-hour movie. In shot form.
A: It's pretty damn close minus credits. I mean Transformers was 2 hrs, then 2 hrs 17 min with credits. I don't know how you count that these days.
UGO: Well, if the credit sequence is really cool, and I'm sure it will be, then I would count that. Are the Romulans - and I know I can't get too specific about plot points - but let's talk about Romulan culture in general. Are Romulans pure evil?
B: No.
A: No. No, way.
UGO: What makes a good Romulan? Like if I was a little boy growing up on Romulus and I wanted to be a good Romulan, what would I do? How do I strive to be a good Romulan?
B: Umm, we'd wanna link this to, the origin of the Romulans being that kind of imperialist crowd, kind of Greco-Roman culture. Not nearly as logical as their cousins the Vulcans. Kind of the passionate Roman republican. And all the trappings of that. And in a way I think it mirrors the way the United States sees itself. Us being based in the western philosophies, as they say.
UGO: How do you differentiate Romulans from Cardassians?
B: They're not cousins of Vulcans. In a way Cardassians are the "next generation" version of Romulans.
UGO: Fair enough. And that sort of brings up a good point. In this film you talk about origin stories, and have the whole Universe - hell, the whole Multiverse - of Trek to deal with. Are you using as your source material only canon from TOS? Or things that entered the world in the later films, or perhaps Next Generation if they were to have been around back then? Was that part of your process when you were creating the story? I'm not asking, ya know, do Cardassians or Nausicans or Breen show up, but would you have considered that part of your world?
A: To us "canon" is considered the original series onward, including the novels.
UGO: Even including the novels! Wow.
A: To some degree. There are actually some things that are very interesting. In the novels and even, to some degree, in the shows vs. the movies there are different interpretations of events, and some blank spots that are open to interpretation. So, in approaching it we saturated ourselves in everything, including the novels Best Destiny and Spock's World.
B: And that might mean that a lot of the continuity we take from the novels might be the character continuity. I forgot the names of them, a couple I love, and I get their names confused, but they take place between Star Trek II and III. Another between IV and V when the probe shows up and you know, Voyage Home. Those, there's a lot that could slot right inbetween those two movies.
UGO: Oh yeah. There were also great comic books done right around that time by Peter David that were phenomenal. With the trial and all that stuff.
B & A mumble affirmatively.
UGO: Well that's great, because, like I said, I try to consider it one big thing. And you know, when I look at all my toys on my desk when I don't feel like doing work, I understand that there will be contradictions but, oh well. Another topic. Chris Pine is a guy that is a little bit of an unknown. Can you tell me a little bit about what he brings to Captain Kirk?
A: Pine is just the greatest. And the thing that's tricky obviously - as is the case with any of the actors who stepped into the shoes of these characters who were created by legendary actors - that the thing you wanna avoid in a way is somehow becoming a caricature of William Shatner, or an imitation of his performance. So, I think the way that we all went into this was, what is the spirit of Kirk? How do we embody the spirit of Kirk? And, what does that mean? And how can we as fans know that our Kirk is being honored and protected, just speaks to the fact that we have cast a new Kirk. And that was a tricky thing. And I think what you'll find is that there is a lot of Kirk you will recognize in the performance, but Chris Pine is his own brilliant actor. And it's all about what he brings to the part. I would say that the spirit of Kirk is very much alive and well in Chris Pine.
UGO: Well you have got lucky with so much of the cast with regard to physical likeness. Not Pine so much, but some of the others really do have a physical resemblance. Obviously Zack Quinto is just perfect. And looking at the images that came out today of Karl Urban as McCoy, I was like, "Yeah! That's McCoy! That's crab-assy McCoy right there!"
B: Karl really is doing that in his performance, it's amazing. He really turned into this character.
UGO: Very exciting stuff. Now, you say that there will be certain things that we'll recognize, and one of the things I wanna see from Kirk is that top of the head clobber move with his fist. Is there a name for that, by the way?
B: I've always referred to it as the Kirk chop.
UGO: The Kirk-chop, yeah. And you know I'm mixed, do I wanna see the Kirk Chop? Shatner does the Kirk Chop and Chris Pine is his own man. I respect that. But I know that, at opening night at the Ziegfeld in New York, if the Kirk Chop shows up, everybody's gonna lose their shit. I'm sure these are the questions that you ask yourselves. It's tough. You don't want to make it a parody, but you want to have a lot of fun. I imagine a lot of sleepless nights over this project.
B: Yeah, but on the other hand, to get paid to discuss whether the Kirk Chop is in the movie or not is a dream come true.
UGO: Absolutely.
B: I'd rather sit in a meeting for 4 hours and debate the Kirk Chop than have a real job.
UGO (suddenly very excited): OK, now I know that you can't tell me if it's in the movie or not, but did you discuss the Kirk Chop? Was that actually something that was brought up?
B: Of course we discussed the Kirk chop!!! How could we not discuss the Kirk chop?!?
UGO: Oh man, so there is an answer! It's a yes or no! And I'm gonna find out on May 8th, and not before then, okay okay okay. That's awesome. That's just worth the price of admission right there.
B & A titter.
UGO: Um, the bridge, I'm sure you're gonna catch a little bit of hell because there are some psychopaths that feel that everything has to look exactly how it looks on the TV show. But there's not as much color. When I saw it, it reminded me a little bit of the bridge in Star Trek: The Motion Picture, with a little bit of Tron. Because there was some blue in there.
B: You'll have to see the floor, I guess. Wait til you see the floors, they're gorgeous.
A: It's funny actually. Because in the pictures you are getting such a limited view of the bridge. I think what you'll find when you see the movie is that there is more original series design in the movie than in any of the movies that have come so far.
UGO: That's interesting. Now another thing for me, as a kid growing up, I'm from the NY area, and Trek was on at midnight on Channel 9. And I would watch it every night religiously as a kid. And I would drift off and fall asleep to the sound effects. To the rumbling of the ships, some of the little noises, and the communicator sounds. Those cheesy sound effects that were recorded in 1966 that mean so much to us, are they going to appear in the film?
B: That was also discussed. That one's left as a yes or a no.
UGO: I gotcha.
B: The sound design is definitely going to be influenced by what came before. And we actually went through the same question on Transformers in terms of the original iconic sound. And in Transformers it was used sparingly and in the right places.
UGO: Oh by the way, hats off to slippin' Uhura in Transformers. Don't think I didn't catch that.
B: Sure, yeah. We were actually amazed we got to slip it into Transformers.
UGO: Well you know, let me turn the tables on you. As you know I work for an entertainment website, and I cover films, but you can see that this is a film that really means a lot to me, because of my nature as a socially malformed being. What questions do you have for me? For the mouth-breathing Star Trek fanatic that's seen every episode a million times, who has more than one pewter Enterprise in his home, whose wife thinks he's a little crazy, but accepts it. What do you want to know from me, the hardcore audience?
B: I'd love to see some research done on everyone's Top 8 things that they think would have to be in this. A lot of the feedback we're getting back now is "This should be a no-brainer, in terms of putting in their origins in the story, because it would obviously have to include X." So what are those? Now you know the parameters. Everyone's meeting somehow or another, and you know Nimoy's in it, so give me some top 5 things. What do you have to see in this movie?
UGO: Um, I need to see the Kirk chop!
B & A laugh.
UGO: I just need to have a really good time. I have a very good friend and his franchise is Star Wars, of which I am just a regular fan, and my franchise is Star Trek, which he likes but, you know, isn't crazy like me. And with the Star Wars prequels, a little part of him died. He feels that the prequels were bad enough, that they have sullied his love for the first three films. And I gotta say when I learned of the project, and you're gonna think I'm crazy, but I literally had one or two sleepless nights. I would literally sit in bed and stare, and think "What if Trek gets ruined?" And as I said, everything I've seen so far, has mellowed me out. Has made me think that this is gonna' be fun. So, for what that's worth, so far, so good.
B: That's the thing, and we can both speak to this. We absolutely understand that fear.
UGO: Yeah, and I know that its crazy. I know that it's psychotic, but it's there nonetheless.
B: You know, we had sleepless nights too before we agreed to go yea or nay. Because we were literally thinking about it, and like your friend, just worried that something this beloved might be...
A: Somehow disrespected or dishonored or ruined. There's nothing worse than the feeling when something you loved as a kid that is then brought back where you are older makes you feel like an old person. There's nothing worse than that. And in a way, the thing that we wanted, maybe more than anything, in taking this on, was to have people like your friend, come to this movie and feel that unlike a lot of the movies that have come before, this one is actually doing it again, and you walk out with a little skip in your step, because you've tapped into that thing that you felt when you saw the Enterprise for the first time. Or any variant on that. So believe me when we say that we were so very nervous, and continue to be very nervous about that feeling.
B: And I would say that we keep referring to it as though we were called to duty. It's Paramount and J.J. Abrams, and Brian Burke, and Damon Lindelhoff - they show up - and it's gonna be you trying to figure it out. We couldn't just say no to that, even though we weren't thinking, "We have the solution to Star Trek."
UGO: But you didn't want to have somebody else screw it up.
A: Kind of. At some point you ask yourself if you're gonna yell at the screen. Especially when you have the chance and you didn't take it. Are you gonna yell at the screen because you were unhappy how it turned out or are you gonna hate yourself for never having tried. And ultimately I think we thought we would hate ourselves more if we didn't try.
UGO: Well, listen folks, thanks a lot for talking. I really appreciate it.
A: Of course.
UGO: Good luck and I'm sure we'll be bugging you again as we get closer to next May.
Check out TrekMovie.com's interview with Bob & Alex, too!
