I believe there is a Biblical view of what a husband should be, if a husband acts outside those bounds he may be a controlling husband. We will first look at what a controlling husband looks like from a Biblical worldview, and then what actions are NOT those of a controlling husband(even though the world claims they are).
He refuses to let his wife be involved with other women, whether they be friends, or family and insists her whole life be focused on his needs, wants and desires. Now that we have discussed what a controlling husband is from Biblical view point, we will turn our attention to what is NOT a controlling husband from Biblical view point.
He completely controls the finances, even money his wife may earn, and gives her a weekly allowance for groceries, clothing and things that she or the children may need.
While he allows his wife to express her opinions on all manner of subjects privately with him, he determines the public family opinions on religion and politics. He expects his wife to fulfill her duties as a wife, including having sex with him and caring for their home and their children. He expects his wife not to disagree with him in public, but that she will keep her disagreements for private discussions with him. He expects his wife to be respectful of other men as well, especially in mixed gender gatherings. While his wife may be courteous with other men, he expects that his wife will never ever flirt with another man. While his wife may find other men attractive, he expects her not to gawk or act in an unladylike manner toward other men.

While a husband should allow his wife to have lady friends with whom she can share her feelings and have a bond in a way only women can, he also has the right to restrict her from certain women whom he feels are a negative influence on his wife. If you have looked at the first 7 points I gave about a controlling husband, and he matches most of them then you indeed have a problem.
If however, your husband is truly acting in controlling or unloving ways towards you, first examine if you have been a disrespectful or unloving wife toward him. You are not the first wife to deal with an unkind or cruel husband, and you will not be the last.
A husband has a solemn duty as part of his marriage commitment, to provide for the needs of his wife and family. You can be a great wife and glorify God in your own family that you've formed together, and here are some suggestions. But even coming from a Biblical gender roles view as I do, I still believe in and have seen the controlling husband.
But the world, including many people who profess faith in Christ and his Word, have rejected the Biblical view of a husband, and that makes them have a very expanded view of what a controlling husband is. Such behavior is despised by God, and according to I Peter 3:7 God will not hear the prayers of a man who treats his wife with such contempt. He expects that his wife will not correct other men, or be too opinionated in the presence of other men. While his wife may communicate with other men in his presence, he expects that his wife will never have a private friendship with any man other than her male relatives (father, brothers).

But hopefully you have also ran your thoughts by the 10 items I have mentioned above, and you are not considering you husband to be controlling because of any of these actions. Contrary to what some Christians have taught, if he is physically abusing you – you do not have to stay and take that.
If you are bucking your husband for any of the 10 things I stated above that are NOT the marks of a controlling husband, then you need to repent to God and your husband for rebelling against his God given authority over you and your family.
Actually, it's up to you and your husband as traditional Christians to work through your relationship in Christ and how you can each do your part to fulfill the desires and needs of each other.
Be vigorous and lively in your pursuits as a loving, affectionate Christian."15 For such is the will of God that by doing right you may silence the ignorance of foolish men.
You also do not have the right to stop performing your duties and responsibilities as a wife and mother due to his unkind words. He does not always expect that his wife will agree with his interpretations, but he expects her to have a teachable spirit and respect for his right as her husband to teach her the Word of God. This would be no less for a wife who is physically abused by her husband, as a wife had more rights than a slave.
Christian friendships and relationships work best when each partner calmly expresses their current emotion -- without harping on what the other did.

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