drovecross-countrywithhisoldestson,now21.Four
days inacar, just the twoof them.Atacursoryglance,
not thefirstchoice invacations.
“Waseverymomentof itadelight?”asksRosenfeld.
“No.Wegot toknoweachotheranawful lotbetter,
some for thebetter, some for theworse, butoverall for
thebetter. Itwasanamazing trip.”
Theseare themoments thatmake lifematter.
Yes, sayAgateandRosenfeld, but it’s importantnot
todrapevacationscompletely insun-splasheddaysand
carefree,merry-go-roundnights.You’lldo thatwhen
youremember them later.Thehonest truth is that fami-
liesonvacationexperiencedifficulties too.Expertshave
noted this inanecdotal research taken from folks like,
well,us.Raiseyourhand ifyou’veneverexperienced
somesortof collapse, crying jag, oratavisticurge to
clenchyour throatonacarefreegetaway. Ipossessno
doctorate, but I’llwager there’snotonehand in theair.
But, saysRosenfeld, “troubleonavacation isnot
necessarilyabad sign. It’s just a signof a typical fam-
ilyandabadmoment andmaybeanopportunity for
growth, particularlywhenyourkidsare trying to
separate fromyou.”
And thechance forrealdialoguecanbegreater
whenaway from thestressesanddistractionsofhome.
“Nothinghas tobeaccomplished,” saysRosenfeld.
“There’sno cell phone ringingall the timeor email to
check.You’re there togetherandnothinghas tobe
done, andevery sooften therewill bea lull andyou’ll
have real conversations that oftendon’t occur inour
hurried lives.”
Given today’sperpetuallyplugged-inworld,Agate
sees today’s familyvacation inadifferent light.
“Takingavacation ismore importantnow than
ever,”saysAgate. “Oureveryday livesaremore
distracted than they’veeverbeen. Familiesneed
togetaway from theirdistracted livesand focus
oneachother, onstrengthening their relationships
and recharging theirbonds.”
It canhappen.We all know it. And I don’t have to
closemy eyes to remember.
Our sons are older now; one is leaving for college
this fall. But I still see them skinny-ribbed in the
sunshine, diligentlypickinguphorseshoe crabbits.
Wenever assembledan entire crab. Life canbedis-
appointing thatway. Butwewalked together across
the sand, thewavesmaking their soothing sounds,
thebutterflypress of our sons’ hands inours.
Sometimes life’s piecesfit together inways you
don’t expect.
Familiesengaged in the time-honored traditionof leaving laundry
and lethargybehindandheadingoff to largelygoofaroundcan
sculpt themselves in importantways.
©H. ARMSTRONGROBERTS/GETTY IMAGES
TRAVEL
Ode to the Family Vacation
SUMMER 2011
celebratedliving.com
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