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Sit down and talk with your daughter before she gets pregnant and at an early age and make sure she understands how pregnancy happens. If she is sexually active or even considering becoming sexually active, make sure she knows about contraception and uses it. If she has already become pregnant, sit down with her (calmly and lovingly) and make sure she understands what has happened to her. Parents, if your daughter is pregnant, give her all the support she is going to need and all the good advice you can, no matter what decision she makes about the baby. If you are or have been the parent of a teenager, or have ever spent more than a few hours with a teenager, especially when they are around their friends or parents, you are unfortunately familiar with the disdainful eye-roll. I believe the eye-roll the equivalent of a door slam, either when there is no door available or because they have too many clothes piled on their bedroom floors to get the adequate propulsion needed for a dramatically reverberating doorway.
Living day-in-and-day-out with teenagers in the midst of their identity search is one of the greatest challenges you will confront. If you don't allow your children to express their anger, frustration, and depression these emotions can come out unconsciously as attempts to get back at you though failing in school, drinking, or other dangerous behavior.
During this time of natural disorganization and hormonal upheaval, your teens are individuating from the family and developing their own values. The multitasking we did when they were younger, such as pay bills or fold laundry when they were asking questions or telling us all the details of their day, is ultimately interpreted as us not really listening… or caring about their questions or answers.
Sometimes silence about what is going on in their lives may be your teens' way of protecting you from anxieties they feel you cannot handle.
When your teen does open up to you with a problem, she will feel dismissed if you try to simplify her complex feelings and conflicts in your terms or with your experiences. Whether it is about her terrible best friend, the small size of her room, or the assignment of chores, rather than agree with, minimize, or attempt to solve the situation, resist that instinct.
First wait until they are finished speaking and then, before responding, repeat back what you believe they said… without emotion or judgment in your tone.
Consider that helpful criticism does not attack the person and arouse defiance; it deals with the difficult event.
Don't be frustrated when your child opposes your standards, resists your rules, and tests your limits. As teens seek more privileges, freedom, money, or privacy parents, ever vigilant, worry about the possibility of falling grades, substance abuse, or increased sexual activity that could potentially follow if they acquiesce to these requests. For example, if you are open to some of their unusual choices in clothes, teens will be that much less likely to get into power struggles over the big-ticket items such as drugs and alcohol.
Give teens responsibilities to also let them know that adult privileges are earned by taking part in the daily functioning of the family (chores).
Be ready to react neutrally to cries of 'injustice' when your child suffers the inevitable consequences you have described to him.
When you model the values you hope for in your children, respond with more positive and direct responses, and avoid sarcasm, you'll be promoting their positivity and commendable values of their own. When you provide opportunities for challenge with the support they need to learn from setbacks, teens build confidence to develop self-esteem from successes.
If you become a pregnant teenager, your whole life will change and your character will grow by being responsible for another human being.
Being a single parent is a difficult task, even for adults, but even more so for a teen mother. Abortion is not meant to be used as a form of birth control with repeated abortion after abortion. However, what ever method you decide to choose, become informed about it and any risks to you and to your baby. If you have any specific questions regarding pregnancy, childbirth, newborn care, contact your local midwife or health care provider about options and discuss your concerns with that person that will be providing your prenatal care. After the pregnancy ends, it is vital you get contraception counseling and use it so it does not happen again. On the other hand, of the eleven states with the lowest rate of teenage births – New Hampshire (16), Massachusetts (17), Vermont (18), Connecticut (19), New Jersey (20), Maine (21), Rhode Island (22).
Anti-abortionists might claim that the reason for a lower birth rate in the Northeast is that the high rate of abortions.
Combining the rate of births and abortions shows that teenagers are far more likely to become pregnant in those states professing moral values, than they are in the godless regions of the country. Religion’s problem is that it invites its adherents to see the world as they want it to be, not as it is. More Recent PostsHillary Clinton Takes It to Donald TrumpAre Nutritionists the New Weathermen?
There is a movement in this country to recriminalise abortion at the state level - especially in those states comprising the "bible belt" - and in states with rabid Republican state governments (though the two are usually the same). Illinois and Wisconsin are currently overrun with pregnant teenage boys, thanks to the Chicago Department of Public Health. AdFreak is a daily blog of the best and worst of creativity in advertising, media, marketing and design. South Africa is a country plagued by teenage pregnancy, and with the most recent legislatorial changes giving consent to children as young as 12 years  to engage in consensual sexual activities- teenage pregnancy seems far from over.
The new legislature was by Judge Pierre Rabie following an application made by the Teddy Bear Clinic for Abused Children.
The child support grant is a government initiative intended to minimize poverty and to lend a helping hand to poverty-stricken families.
According to a survey conducted by Pondering Pander and published on News24,  “…45% of teenage mothers fall pregnant to get government grants”. Phakama Mjoli said on Facebook: “South Africa is already under threat due to the HIV pandemic- how is the “new law” going to help?
Is it the society that’s failing today’s teenagers or is it their attitude or there is more to it than what we all can see? Online psychologists believe that teenage girls who experience disruptive childhoods get pregnant younger.
Conducting a survey at the Durban University of Technology, most teenagers seem to agree with this prognosis.


Thembi Nzuza a middle aged woman strongly feels that the schoolig system is playing its part when it comes to informing the youth. With teenagers adapting this, “laissez faire attitude,” there’s not much that can be done to minimize and eventually get rid of teenage pregnancy and sexually transmitted disease. ISIPHANDLA: A CONNECTION TO ANCESTORS Thank you Thandi Shabalala for finding interest in our articles. Teenage rebellion, be it in the form of objectionable hair styles, clothing, or music, messy rooms, or even drinking alcohol and telling lies, is their attempt to initiate separation. Yet endure it you must because it is this process of conflict and confrontation that enables them to move to their next stage of life.
Tolerate restlessness, respect loneliness, and accept the discontent as part of the natural, but tumultuous, progression from child to adult. If you instead show that you respect them, you will prevent a rupture that can occur in your relationship at a time when maintaining connections is vital to the years immediately ahead. Preservation of your own values and demonstration of your faith in their ability will provide tools for their success.
It is up to you to assure them that you are willing to talk, not just at them, but with them in a realistic manner. If your son does a poor job at washing the shared family car, you might be tempted to say, "I didn't know we had such hard water. The direct alternative could be, "I appreciate your effort so far, but the car still needs more work, especially on the top and left side. As with the active listening, be permissive when dealing with your child's feelings and wishes. Rather than let your anxieties force you to become overly restrictive, be flexible when you can.
The more control you allow your teens over their choices, the more likely they are to become confident adults who, when they run into a problem will see what their options are and make a decision based on what they think is best. Maintain a matter-of-fact tone and your stance that it is not a punishment, but a consequence of his choice.
When you allow your teens to make some decisions you know aren't great, but that won't be dangerous or hurtful, you build their self-awareness. Help your teenagers build resilience and perseverance and they will leave home with the power to transform obstacles into opportunities for growth and learning.
Having a baby is life changing for adult women who have family support and a husband or partner. You will have to make decisions about whether you will keep the baby, have an abortion (you have to be early in your pregnancy for this option), or give it up for adoption. If you must drop out, continue with adult education night classes and obtain your GED and consider going on to attend a community college or trade school for further education. Depending on your age and health circumstances, you may not be able to birth your baby outside of a hospital (in a birth center or at home with a midwife) since you may be considered high risk. There are medical risks involved with this medical procedure, not to mention emotional concerns and sometimes regrets with terminating a pregnancy.
Do not be pushed into a decision by other people that you do not want to do, whether it be to keep the baby, abort the baby, or to put the baby up for adoption. If it helps, have your parents with you during your meetings with your midwife so that they can also have their questions answered. Consult with your health care provider, midwife, or local clinic about options available for you and your health concerns. It is true that the rate of abortion is higher in the Northeast than it is in the Bible Belt, but not nearly enough to explain the difference. Follow us as we celebrate (and skewer) the latest, greatest, quirkiest and freakiest commercials, promos, trailers, posters, billboards, logos and package designs around. The survey also revealed that “37% of the youth think teenagers fall pregnant because they don’t believe in birth control, and 11% thought it was because they want children”. In Kwa-Zulu Natal alone approximately 17 000 school-going teens were pregnant in 2010, this is according to an article published on News24. Basing her view on personal experience, she feels that having a child in your teens is not as bad as what many people think it is. According to an article published by The Guardian, “not being breastfed, an absent father, moving houses frequently and a lack of involvement of parents in upbringing all brought forward age of first pregnancy”. These kids have guidance classes in which they are taught to look after themselves- these classes enable them to be good decision makers and to be responsible individuals. The youth are the future of this country but judging by their attitude, the future may be bleak.
Their ability to foresee consequences for their actions and behavior appears to be limited and only comes with maturity and experience.
Try to keep your communications open with her (I know it is hard when they hit puberty and become more secretive about their lives).
They need to know about how babies are made and how to use condoms and other protection to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Make sure your daughter takes the responsibility for her child and allow her to mother him or her. You loved your child all of his or her life, but most teens are so vulnerable that they repeatedly test you to prove your love. Teenagers of each generation need to experiment with different identities before settling into their own adult personality. If you choose your battles carefully and maintain your child’s respect for your important rules of sobriety and safety and for the values you have embraced throughout their lives, you’ll keep them on track. If you don't agree with her opinion or plans, you can keep communication open (and keep doors from slamming) if you acknowledge and reflect your teen's feelings about something even without agreeing with her point of view.
When can you do it?" This will be more likely to elicit a less emotionally reactive, more positive response.
Most teenagers, while demanding more independence, are at least in part, begging for structure. Then, when you are strict in dealing with unacceptable behavior and enforcing limits, you have shown that you respect his opinions and attitudes, acknowledged his dreams and desires, but reserved the right to stop and redirect some of his actions.


The message you'll be sending is that he is part of a family with certain required responsibilities. These will not be easy decisions and whatever decisions you make, you will have to live with them the rest of your life.
Education is very important if you are going to be a single parent because you will need to have a good job to help support you and your baby. Hospitals and health care providers are very expensive and if you do not have medical insurance, it will be a heavy financial burden on you. It can be a relief or a traumatic experience for a teen girl (or any woman), depending on where her head is at and her personal feelings about ending the pregnancy. If you are too late in your pregnancy for an abortion, then you will have to go through the birth process and make the choice of keeping the baby or adoption. Weight all the pros and cons of each possible decision before you make your final decision.
The CDPH's Office of Adolescent and School Health has rolled out a new teen-pregnancy prevention campaign that features pictures of pregnant teenage boys, and the accompanying text reads "Unexpected?
She continued to say that she feels the monthly child support grant is partially responsible for the ascending teenage pregnancy rate.
I don’t understand why they are not using what’s being taught in the classroom to approach daily challenges,” Nzuza said. If you are hoping for a calm family dinner, they will grimace and drum their fingers while complaining about the meal. Defiance, in your teenager's mind and challenges to your love is their bumpy pathway to autonomy. Influence her, not by telling her how she should be or act, but by encouraging her to develop self-reflection, morals, and values of her own.
Since you are better able to control your emotions, anticipate you teen's resentment of rules.
In turn, the sense of control they feel over part of their destiny gives them more opportunities to consider alternatives and build self-confidence. During the teenage developmental stage of self-engrossment, establishing areas of responsibility helps them learn that freedom is grounded in accountability.
Besides, some of the most successful psychologists, sociologists and well maintained people have messed up kids. Children, not finding an adoptive parent(s) and growing up in group homes (orphanages) or foster care, often have many emotional problems with feeling abandoned and tossed away by their mothers. Of course, I did not do this, but I did get a fair amount of stress-related white hair from this time period.
It only takes one slip-up and they will be paying child support for the next 18 years or more.
She needs be responsible for her actions and she needs to be the child's mom to help her grow and mature. By serving as an example while spending time with them will, your teens know you love them and that they are worthwhile.
You'll be demonstrating your respect while encouraging her to think further and find her own solutions. Your goal is not to be your teenager's pal but rather his or her friendly guardian, concerned and strong enough to endure temporary animosity when you uphold standards and values that are in their best interests.
Your chances, if you keep your priorities in the right place, set your goals as far as education and career, and employ the support and love of your family, religious counselors or church, community and friends, will be less. Try to talk with your parents or another adult you trust if you need help in making a decision.
Children take a lot of work, full commitment and dedication if you are to be a good parent. Today, if you do not have some college or a degree, you are going to be stuck in a no-where job working for minimum wage. Get to know your daughter's friends and be active in her life (whether she protests or not). If they do agree to your requests, they forget (their term) or ignore (your term) their promises. When your limits are neither arbitrary nor capricious, and are anchored in values aimed at character building, your child will eventually recognize that you had his best interests in mind. However, if they are not done by that time, the privilege of phone conversation will be revoked for the remainder of that evening. You may get conflicting advice from various sources, but the final decision is yours to make. If you are in a relationship with a boy, you will have to discuss it with him and find out about child support or continued relationship plans.
If you do not want college, find a trade school and learn a trade, such as becoming a hair stylist, a chef, or a medical assistant.
But social workers and adoptive agencies try their best to find a good home for their babies and children.
Babies are not born with written instructions and most of our parenting is trial and error and learned from our parents and life experience.
They may not be very happy about the pregnancy and may even be quite upset, but most often this will pass with time and your growing tummy. I am a firm believer that all babies should be wanted and loved to be able to grow into mentally stable and emotionally secure adults. Sexually suggestive text messaging (sexting) and social site pressures (such as facebook) and other external influences are a major issue with modern teens. But, as parents, we try to keep our children from making too many life altering mistakes if we can. They begin to spend more time away from the safety and security of their home and become more interactive with life outside the family setting.



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