
Building a Relationship with Yourself

When you think about how you feel about yourself, and how well you know yourself, 
how do you score on a scale of 1 - 10? If you feel that you know yourself very well, but 
you are on the lower side of how much you like yourself, then it might be time to start 
thinking about how you can build a better relationship with yourself, and the next pages 
will be exploring how to accomplish this. 


Stop Focusing on the Dealings of Others 

There are tons of distractions that can be found out in the world, but some of the worst 
distraction to get involved with are those that comes from spending too much time 
focusing on and critiquing the lives of others. It can be extremely easy to fall into the 
habit of spending your time concerning yourself with the movements of others, and you 
may even spend time discussing these things with others, but it's important to note that 
while you’re focusing on others, you’re avoiding work that you can be doing on yourself. 

Another side of this, is that it might be a manifestation of insecurities that you feel 
towards yourself due to constant comparing. The person who is aware of the nuances 
of how you feel would be you, because people can’t read the minds of others. If you feel 
as though you are constantly scrutinized by others, it’s important to remember that they 
might not even be aware that you feel any discomfort at all. Most of the time, people are 
primarily focused on how they are seen by others. 


Learn to Forgive People 

It’s really hard to make a better relationship with yourself when you carry a lot of 
baggage from past dealings with people. Things sometimes happen that can make your 
feel a little bit sour about having relationships with others but it’s important to remember 
that you don’t need to hold into these things. Let them just be things that happened and 
move on. It’s been said that forgiving people is more about being healthier for yourself 
than the person you’re forgiving. This is because holding onto to anger and pain will 
only cause you to feel negatively about a lot of other things in your life. 

Once you have forgiven someone completely, the part of your mind that has been 
holding onto those toxic thoughts and feeling will be free to focus on better things. You 
can use that brain power to think of ways to put good things into the world around you. 
There are a lot of ways to spread positivity, and the best ways involve doing something 
for others. 


Take Time to Help Someone in Need

There are few joys that can compare to the feeling you get when you help someone 
who really needs help. When you’ve been spending a lot of time focusing on yourself in 
unhealthy ways, a really good way to break out of that is also to help someone else. 
This puts them in the forefront of your mind for a time, and this can help you to 
appreciate the situation that you have as well. 

There are a lot of programs that involve helping the homeless and elderly, and both are 
in constant need of volunteers that can help dilute the strain placed on other people who 
are already busy in the community. You might be surprised by the outpouring of 
gratitude that comes from people who haven’t been used to getting the help that you’re 
helping to provide. This can create connections and inspire the future success of people 
who might not have had the opportunity otherwise. 


Write a Journal or a Letter to Yourself

Part of getting to the deeper parts of yourself is taking time out of your day to put your 
thoughts on paper so that you can read them back to yourself. Sometimes it takes this 
kind of exercise in order to be able to get a sense of what is truly on your mind. You 
might have doubts about recent decisions, or you might need to see your thoughts out 
in front of you to make those final choices. Whatever the case may be, this will help you 
to begin to prioritize your feelings and thoughts about things. Once you’ve drawn some 
conclusions it’ll be easier to make real changes based on the information you have 
about yourself. 


Practice Positive Self-Talk 

After you’ve taken some time to think about the things you wrote down to yourself, make 
some effort to replace anything negative that you said to yourself with something that is 
positive. Talk about your abilities. Tell yourself that you can accomplish your goals. The 
more that you repeat these things to yourself, the more possible they will become.  








