Focus on Your Future, Not the Past

All people react to events in life very differently. Sometimes things happen in life that 
can change you and those around you forever, but it's really how you deal with these 
things that says a lot about who you are. Another factor here is where you place your 
focus. It can be easy to dwell on the past, and get stuck wondering what might have 
been, but is that really what you should do? Here are some ways you can practice self-
care by focusing on your future, not on your past. 


You’re Still Here 

When it comes to reflecting on past events, there’s one thing that you can always find 
some appreciation for. You’re still here. That means that whatever has come before 
you, whether it was a massive obstacle or defeat, that event didn't end you. You’re still 
here, and that says a lot about how resilient you can be. It’s important to realize that 
people are remarkably good at coming out on top of what they might find themselves up 
against. The fact that you can read this right now is a testimony to that. You might want 
to know what comes next, and that’s completely normal. The next steps to try to find 
more things that you can be happy about.  


Practice Gratefulness

The first step to really getting grounded and centered would be for you to spend some 
time focusing on what you are grateful for. There are lots of ways to do this, but one of 
the best would be for you to write a gratefulness journal. This will give you the ability to 
look at the list after you have completed it. That will allow you to see everything that you 
can think of and set your mind to thinking about that instead of the things you wish had 
taken place in the past. Pick ten to fifteen of your favorite things and make a list of those 
things a few times a week. 
 

Accept Negativity as Lessons

It can be really frustrating when you put time and effort into certain relationships only to 
find that the person or persons were never what or who they said they were. This can 
be extremely jarring, and it might take a long for you to get over, but the more effort you 
make to get over it, the happier you will be in the long run. The healthiest way to look at 
these kinds of things is to treat them the way you would treat a lesson you learned in a 
school program. They’re not always the most pleasant, but you can take what you 
learned about people in that situation and use it to protect you from similar happenings 
in the future. 

This doesn’t mean that you color every interaction with other people with the same 
feelings towards them as the people you encountered in the past, it’s more about 
awareness and avoiding giving people the same kind of unchecked power over you, 
and your emotions. Being completely frozen with fear and building a wall around 
yourself will be counterproductive. 


Learn to See a Better Future

When you start to see yourself and your future in a more positive light, it’s a lot easier to 
see possibilities that can be open to you. Instead of thinking about where things went 
wrong, you can choose to use past experiences to prepare you for the kinds of things 
that can go wrong, and be ready for them instead of taken by surprise. When you have 
a better outlook on things, it’s a lot easier to attract more positive things in life. If you’ve 
committed to making a few positive changes in life that can help you achieve goals, 
then it’s important to figure out how to lay the path that allows you to get there. 


Plan for Future Goals with a List

In order to make your goals more solid to yourself, it’s a really good idea to try making a 
list. That will allow you to see all of the things you want each day. The more focused on 
those things you become, the more likely it will be that you are motivations to make sure 
that they come true. Having the list also means that you can put the goals into an order 
of most important to least important so that you know what you should be spending 
most of your time pursuing. 


Distance Yourself from Toxic People 

This will be the hardest part of this article for a lot of people. A lot of people tie their 
worth to the amount of relationships they have even when the people in their lives aren’t 
the most positive or supportive people. This can be a huge impediment to progress, 
both professionally and personally. The best thing to do, is to assess each relationship 
you have and find out if those friends have been toxic, self-esteem damaging people, of 
if they’ve been good, uplifting friends that have helped you to see yourself in a healthier 
way. 

