How to Help Your Depressed Friends and Loves Ones

You have probably arrived here because you have someone close to you who is 
suffering from depression, and you want to help. You have just made the first most 
important step, which is to learn how you can help them. Here are some things you can 
do (and avoid) when it comes to supporting friends and loved ones with depression and 
other mental illnesses.

What Not to Do

Before talking about ways to help people with depression, let’s take a moment to 
discuss what you should not do or say. These are sometimes objective since everyone 
is different, but they provide a good general guideline. Helping others means never 
judging them, first of all. It is okay to not understand how depression works, but you are 
there to be supportive. Don’t try to cure their depression, assume it will go away if they 
try hard enough, or be critical of how they deal with their mental illness.

Try to avoid saying things like just relax and deal with it. This is only going to make them 
feel worse and like they can’t even do depression the right way. Don’t avoid being 
around them or talking to them just because you don’t understand what they are going 
through. And lastly, just because your friend does not return your call, does not mean 
you should not continue reaching out. They might not be in a place where they can talk, 
but they will still appreciate the gesture.

Invite Them Over

A really easy way to connect and check in on someone who suffers from depression is 
to simply be there for them. Don’t ask them to let you know if they need anything, 
because even if they do, they will most likely say no. They feel worthless and lack 
confidence and don’t want to be a burden on others. Instead of that approach, think of 
something casual and fun you can do together, that they would also enjoy doing. It can 
be as simple as inviting them over for dinner or going out for coffee or to a movie. 

Show Your Concerns in a Gentle Way

Asking questions about their health or showing that you are concerned about them is a 
good way to check in on people with depression, but always be kind, gentle, and non-
confrontational. You should not make them feel judged or like they are being criticizes. 
Instead, let them know you have been thinking about them, tell them you are concerned 
when you are, and ask if there is a way you can support them.

