How to Cope with Grief Over the Holidays

During the holiday season, any grief you might be experiencing could be heightened. 
This is often the time of year when families get together, so it can be really difficult when 
you aren’t able to have quality time with a loved one who passed – whether it was 
recent or not. If you are struggling to cope with your grief during the holidays, these tips 
can help.

Understand and Accept That Holidays Will Be Different
The first thing you will need to do when you are grieving over the holidays is have 
acceptance. There is a reason this is one of the stages of grief that people are always 
talking about. You need to accept not just what has happened and the feelings you are 
experiencing, but that things will be different. This includes your holiday celebrations. 
Maybe the person you lost was usually the host of a party, someone you always sat 
with and talked to, or just a close friend or relative that is going to be severely missed 
any time everyone gets together. Understand that the holiday is going to be and feel 
different, and that it’s okay to be sad about it.

Consider Spending Your Holidays with Other People
It is also okay to change your original holiday plans. You have every right to say no to 
anyone you want, regardless of what they might think about it. Grieving does not have 
any rules, and is not something everyone has to do in any certain way. If you feel like 
spending holidays with certain people is going ot be too painful for you, politely turn 
down the invitation and do something else. Whether you prefer to be alone or with 
people who won’t remind you of the person you lost, this is your choice.

Set Boundaries and Be Open with Your Loves Ones
This is especially important if the person you lose was very close to you, such as a 
parent, child, sibling, spouse, or best friend. In these cases, it is even more important 
that you are very open with people about what you can and can’t handle. If someone is 
hosting a normal holiday celebration, and you would rather people don’t ask you about 
the person you lose, or you don’t want a certain tradition that is too hard to handle, let 
them know. Be honest about what you are going through and what will help you to get 
through the holiday event while you are grieving.

