Unexpected Things That Happen with Grief

If you have lost someone, the process of grief is very complicated and complex. Some 
people go through the 5 stages of grief, while other people have 7 stages of grief, and 
only deal with some of what others experience. You might also find some unexpected 
things happen when you are grieving and going through the healing process.

There is No “Getting Over it”
Remember that there is no point where you are suddenly over your grief. It will start 
getting better, hurt less, and you will be sad less often, but you will never forget the loss 
you have endured. This is one of the unexpected things of going through a major loss 
that causes a lot of grief. That grief creeps up on you in the most unusual and 
unexpected ways. You might be fine for months, then suddenly a long or movie comes 
on that immediately brings you back to how you felt when you first lost that person or 
the traumatic event occurred. 

Grief Comes Back in Waves
As mentioned, it comes back in waves, sometimes at very odd moments. You might 
expect to be reminded by that person when you hear their favorite song, but what you 
might not expect is that certain times of the year, you just feel sad or depressed. It isn’t 
always apparent right away, but it is like your mind and body know the time of year 
before you do. Maybe you always get a serious wave of grief around the time you two 
first met, or before you realize it was the first day your child went to school. You often tie 
these moments of grief to something significant in your life that you shared with that 
person you lost.

You Find People Who Understand and Support
Another unexpected thing? Some people you thought would be your support system 
are, but other more unexpected people end up being your saving grace. Not everyone 
handles other people’s grief in the way you think they would, and there is nothing wrong 
with that. Though you might be surprised by the people who step up and are always 
there for you, providing the right kind of emotional support that you need.

In Grief, You Experience Many Different Emotions
With severe grief, you will go through a lot of different emotions, often in the same 
period of time. Sadness and depression is to be expected, but what you might not 
expect is the amount of confusion, frustration, anger, irritability, and downright rage over 
what has happened. It is important that you seek professional help if you feel like you 
can’t keep your emotions under control and it is affecting your quality of life.



