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Jim Hoehn: Music

Humanity Night On The Redneck Riviera

(Jim Hoehn)
Jim Hoehn

Another working weekend kind of got me down,
a lonely hotel in some unknown town
No ESPN, it didn't seem right
So with one more day on the rental car,
I hit the coast in search of a bar
And I saw the sign that said, "Live Music Tonight,"

Well, Buddy and the band did hometown Buffett tunes, knocking back tequila,
howling at the gulf moon
Three-chord magic underneath the 'Bama stars
Milton fried fish for the patio crowd,
played the piano when the menu allowed
Cuttin' a rug in that Dauphin Island bar
    With a shrimper and a cowboy and a local artiste,
    Two laid-back bikers and last, but not least,
    A pool-shootin' blond that was bound to scare ya,
    A truckload of tourists from somewhere up north
    And one old guy who rode up on a horse,
    For humanity night on the Redneck Riviera
    Humanity night, oh what a sight,
    Humanity night on the Redneck Riviera
I cut a barstool turn through the sights and smells,
knee-deep in bull and old peanut shells
Halfway between the beach and the twilight zone,
There was some throwin' punches, others throwin' darts, some breakin'
glasses, others breakin' hearts
And a "Dear John," reader whose tears said leave him alone

I heard two generations in search of the truth,
who was better, Aaron or Ruth?
A  long-ball argument, no one could win
A couple more beers they got really profound,
moved the argument out to the mound
Was Ryan faster than Feller? They were at it again


I met a weathered old geezer who claimed to be,
the model for Papa's "Old Man from the Sea,"
Smuggling hopes and dreams 'round the Florida Keys,
A local reporter who was nicknamed Scoop,
writing down the recipe for black bean soup
And a three-legged dog by the jukebox scratching his fleas

Well, I left my change on top of the bar,
hit the floor, the door and the old rental car
It didn't start, but then again I didn't try too hard,
I called the airline canceled my flight,
went back inside and said let's make it a night
And charged the whole thing on my boss's credit card

    Humanity night, oh what a sight, Humanity night on the Redneck Riviera