Home: A Personal Perspective
by Burbie52, HSM team writer
Two years.
I’ve been in Home for over two years now, and it has changed my life in many ways. It has given me friendship with people I would have never met in my small sphere of influence in real life. People from all walks of life all over the world. From all income levels and faiths, people whose outlooks are very different from mine and those around me in real life. Home is like a microcosm of the world packaged up in a pretty little display, for the use and enjoyment thereof.
In real life I can count the close friends I have made in my whole life on one hand. In Home I would have to use both hands and my feet as well and perhaps grow a new arm or two. The fact that the visual aspect of meeting someone is eliminated forces you to take people for their “face” value without all of the physical stuff getting in the way. Yes, we might eventually see pictures of each other after we have come to know a person, but that is just it, you have control over when that takes place which allows you to get to know them through conversation, shared stories and values first. This is what sets Home apart from other ways that we might meet people in the real world.
When I came Home back in December of 2009, it was my very first encounter with a virtual reality of any kind, except in video games. My PS3 was a Christmas gift that year, and what a gift it turned out to be. It opened my eyes to a brand new world of possibilities and perspectives when I first stepped foot in Home. I was like a kid in a candy store, ogling all of the new scenery with wide-open innocent eyes, having never been a chat room denizen or involved in any other type of online communications other than email.
I suppose I was one of the lucky ones, as I met some really nice people right away who took me under their wings and taught me what I needed to know about Home to ease my journey there. The five individuals I met within those first two weeks are still on my friends list, and though we don’t tal
k as much as we used to, we probably always will be friends.
After learning the ropes and navigating around, I started making new friends and began to understand just what I had found in Home: a place to learn about other people and their perspectives, and a place to learn about myself as well. I have learned things here I might have never known from my encounters in real life with people. The nature of Home allows us to feel free to disclose things to people we would never say to those we know in real life — even our families sometimes.
This type of freedom can be very cathartic and good for us. Home can be a place to speak to others on a personal level that we would be reticent to do in real life for fear of repercussions. People being people, though we know them well, on some level we fear to open up many times in real life. Whereas in Home, we can speak more freely because in most cases we won’t ever meet the person on the other end — or, even if we do, we feel that connection that was established through open communication unhindered by physicality, which I believe is very strong by the time you are open to this kind of mutual sharing. Marriages and real relationships have come out of Home’s environment, and I believe that they will be very strong ones too because of all of these elements.
When I created the Grey Gamers in August of 2010, it opened up a whole new perspective to me. It gave me an entire group of people who I can have fun with on a level I was never able to do before it was created, I met some incredible people whom I have come to call very good friends. Through them I played my very first disc-based online game with others — Red Dead Redemption — and had a blast doing it.
Home has changed my life in many ways. Not only has it given me these awesome friends, but it has also given me this new literary voice — something that I would have never dreamed possible before I came here. I’d never written anything other than poetry and fiction before this opportunity presented itself to me. I love writing — always have — but this was a new path for me to follow and I am glad I took it.
Home is what you make of it, much like life itself. We are all the product of our personal choices and decisions both good and bad, and Home is very much the same: it can be a wonderful experience or a terrible one depending on the path you choose to take with it. I have known people who have been hurt by wrong decisions in Home, by trusting the wrong people. Some have left Home never to return because of this, others have brushed themselves off and moved forward and not given up on Home as a place to make real relationships with people who truly care about them.
Then there are those who choose the wrong path right from the start by coming into Home to cause trouble and use it to vent about things that real life has dealt them by hurting people they don’t even know. Some of them grow out of this and become outstanding citizens in this “nation of avatars,” as my friend Sue calls it. Others just continue to act out and hopefully are eventually eliminated from the “avatar gene pool” by being banned continually.
Grey Gamers
Home to me is a place of endless possibilities and fun. There is so much to do here now compared to what was here back in 2009. It amazes me to see where it has gone, and I look forward each week to what is in store for us in the future as it grows and evolves around us.
But one thing here will never change no matter what: the people who dwell within its confines. It is on this social backbone that the rest is built. If the social aspects don’t evolve and keep pace with the gaming side, this place risks becoming a collection of sideshow acts without any glue to hold them together. I hope this never happens and that the powers that be take the necessary steps to maintain the equilibrium necessary to keep Home a strong, growing community of avatars; gaming elements and social elements are like the shoes on your feet — you can go further with both of them on rather than just one.
Here’s to the future of Home. Let’s see what happens.
April 8th, 2012 by Burbie52 | 4 comments
Burbie52 is a 62 year-old published author and founder of the Grey Gamers group within Home. Born and raised in Michigan, she has lived there her entire life, with the exception of a twelve-year residency on the Big Island of Hawaii. She enjoys reading and writing, as well as video games, especially RPG's. She has one son in his twenties.
Wonderful Burbie,
I feel the same way. There is something that happens here that you can’t always explain. The friendships are real and the bonds are as well. I over heard you the other day worried over a friend, because they hadn’t been on. It wasn’t like them to miss something.
It was real;that friendship was real even in this virtual world. That’s Home!
“Home is what you make it, much like life itself” What a great way to describe Home in just a few words, quotable to be sure! Another great article Burbie.
Bravo Burbie! I was once a wallweed, but when I got off the wall, I hurt a little but eventually had loads of fun. This place is a blast when you get by the tough stuff. I never expected this place to be what it turned out to be and I am so happy and honored to be a Gray Gamer, it has made a huge difference being in a group that has a similar outlook to the group dymanic. Great article!
I love your writing style Burbie, it just kinda flows into me, another nice little thought provoker, well done.
Ever since I saw Tron as a kid, I wanted to experience a real, living virtual world. Home has given me this, and then some. I didn’t know you were responsible for The Grey Gamers! Another well done! Is there any end to this woman’s talent?
I really, REALLY wish I could come over to one of your meetings but it seems I was born on the wrong side of the world for it. I do try, but running a business single handedly makes my common sense shout at me every time I consider staying up until 4 or 5am. Shame too as I think we’d get on like a house on fire!