F. Sex-Scripts Are NOT Simon & Gagnon’s Sexual
Scripts.
For clarity, we must distinguish the
sex-scripts of this hypothesis
from the sexual scripts of sociologists William Simon and John Gagnon.
They describe learned patterns of social behavior with respect to sex.
Every culture has several recognized patterns of sexual interaction.
Dating and marriage are the primary sexual scripts of our culture.
Each culture teaches its younger members how
to behave sexually.
Their behavior will be observed, then either reinforced or discouraged.
And even before we are old enough to follow the prescribed patterns,
we know how each sexual script is supposed to unfold.
Chapter I INTRODUCING
THE SEX-SCRIPT
HYPOTHESIS by
JAMES
PARK
13
A sex-script (always spelled with a hyphen) on the other hand,
is not a socially-learned pattern of behavior.
It is not a style of relating that society either approves or
disapproves.
Rather, sex-scripts are private fantasies and imagination.
And frequently our sex-scripts do not lead to organized, external
behavior.
Imprinted sexual fantasies occur in our heads,
more than in our behavior.
But when we try to actualize our imprinted fantasies,
we do become involved in complex, external sexual behavior,
which might correspond with a culturally-recognized sexual script.
The strongest difference is the origin of
these similar phenomena:
Social learning is clearly the source of sexual scripts.
Each culture teaches various patterns of sexual relationships.
But sex-scripts are imprinted more or less at random
at critical periods during the first two decades of life.
Imprinting is quicker and more permanent than
learning.
Some people who have explored their own sexual imprinting
can identify a single event that established a permanent sex-script.
Social learning requires much repetition and reinforcement.
Schooling is a good example of socialization or enculturation.
If we can identify the imprinting that created
our sex-scripts,
such events sometimes become mythic for us.
Such primal events seem to be turning-points in our lives.
And if our primal scenes of sexual imprinting keep coming back to us
when we are sexually interested, aroused, or having orgasms,
this indicates that those scenes, words, smells, objects, clothing, etc.
were deeply imprinted in our brains as elements of the ‘text’ of our
sex-scripts.
At first it might be hard to separate our
learned sexual scripts
from our imprinted sexual fantasies.
But here is the basic distinction:
Our sexual scripts are scenarios we can actualize in the real world.
Society tells us how to relate with members of the other sex.
(Or a homosexual sub-culture provides models for gay relationships.)
Our culture supplies the scripts for elaborate social games and rituals.
We have learned some practical patterns for sexual relationships.
But our imprinted sexual fantasies are not
tied to reality.
Frequently, in fact, our sexual fantasies are impossible to actualize.
Even tho our fantasies run thru our heads in story-like form,
usually these events have never happened, except in pornography
—which might be an externalized form of imprinted sexual fantasies.
14 IMPRINTED SEXUAL
FANTASIES: A NEW KEY FOR
SEXOLOGY by JAMES PARK
An imprinted sexual fantasy is basically internal and private.
A sexual script is basically external and public.
Sex-scripts are imprinted suddenly and permanently at any early age.
Sexual scripts are learned from the culture over a period of years;
and sexual scripts can be unlearned later—if we join a different
sub-culture
or if we change our minds about patterns we once followed.
Different sexual scripts are appropriate for
different phases of life.
As children, we are not supposed to have any sexual behavior at all.
As teen-agers, we are expected to limit our sexual behavior
within acceptable standards of proper ‘dating’ for our culture.
As adults, our sexual scripts call for being married to one person,
with whom we enact all of our sexual behavior.
Here is a parallel comparison that might
clarify the difference
between sudden imprinting and gradual learning:
Our male/female self-designation (I am a boy. / I am a girl.)
was imprinted during the first 18 months of our lives.
But our sex-roles (how we behave because we are female or male)
and our gender-personalities (‘feminine’ or ‘masculine’) were learned.
We were sure that we were either girls or boys
long before we discovered the physical differences between the sexes,
before we learned the different behaviors expected of girls and boys,
and before we developed our ‘feminine’ or ‘masculine’ personality
traits.
Our male/female self-designation was imprinted;
but our sex-roles and gender-personalities were learned.
Sexual scripts are sociological phenomena.
Our society has a wide variety of recognized patterns of sexual
behavior:
dating, marriage, extra-marital affairs, one-night stands, casual sex,
bar-pickups, anonymous couplings in the backrooms of ‘bookstores’, etc.
These are all well-known and easily-described patterns of sexual
behavior.
But imprinted sexual fantasies are not
sociological but psychological.
We find ourselves with internal fantasies that often have nothing to do
with the patterns of sexual behavior well-known in our culture.
These internal fantasy-worlds of sex were not enculturated by society.
And it might not be easy to fulfill our imprinted sexual fantasies.
But sometimes when we put our sexual fantasies into practice,
it does result in a culturally-recognized pattern of behavior.
For example, homosexual sex-scripts call for a partner of the same sex.
And homosexual sub-cultures help people to actualize such sex-scripts
in ways that other members of those sub-cultures will recognize.
Thus, people will similar sex-scripts can create their own sub-cultures,
for example the womanizing sub-culture, the leather sub-culture,
the S & M sub-culture, & various lesbian and gay sub-cultures.
Chapter I INTRODUCING
THE SEX-SCRIPT
HYPOTHESIS by
JAMES
PARK
15
The two pages above are from Chapter I
of Imprinted Sexual Fantasies
by James Park.
This link leads to the table of contents,
from which you can read the rest of this chapter.
Page numbers appear at the bottom of each page—with
the footer.