Before I jump right into things, I’d just like to pre-emptively avoid any possible confusion and stress that when it comes to dating or any type of relationship, it is best not to generalize. I think it’s safe to say the first and most important part of dating a Spaniard is when you meet their family. On a somewhat related note, most Spanish guys still live at home, especially now with the economic crisis. So here’s where things can get sticky because this really depends on your level of Spanish and your boyfriend’s level of English. I’ve written about this many times before, and I keep repeating it, because to this day I have yet to meet a Spaniard, guy or girl, who plans more than a few days in advance.
In fact, I’ve found Spanish men quite shy and not at all forward when it comes to talking to girls. This entry was posted in Culture, Spain and tagged culture series, dating, dating in spain, relationships, romance in spain, Spain. Im actually dating a Moroccan, but he is in every sense a Spaniard and thats because Moroccans are worse than the Spanish. Yes, I have been dating a Spanish man for the past one and a half years, and yes I know many other American girls who are also dating Spanish men.


Meeting the family is a big deal in most cultures, but even more so here, and it can happen pretty soon into the relationship.
I was lucky to have a solid base of Spanish when I came to Spain, but I’ve got friends who started their relationships with zero Spanish and their boyfriends have zero English, and they’ve made it work. I actually think part of that comes from confusion with Latin American men who I’ve found are actually much more romantic than the Spanish. I personally haven’t seen or heard of Spanish men randomly buying flowers or chocolates for their girlfriends, or trying to woo women by breaking out a guitar and singing to them. There are so many other aspects to dating and relationships, but again, it’s hard to get into specifics or give examples because each person is so unique. And while there are some similarities, that’s not to say that all Spanish men are the same.
Three weeks into dating my boyfriend, I still remember when he timidly asked me if I would like to meet his niece and sister.
My boyfriend actually has quite a good base of English, but we’ve maybe spoken a total of twenty words in English during our entire relationship (that’s a whole other issue that has to do more with him not liking to be corrected, but I also think it’s a general Spanish attitude when it comes to English. I’m a compulsive planner, coming from a city where you have to schedule a coffee date with someone at least two days in advance (cue loud gasps from my Spanish readers).


All of those scenes in movies like Vicky Cristina Barcelona with the hot-blooded Spanish man flirting with all those women and wooing them with walks in the park or brazenly approaching them at first lust-filled sight…yea that’s just a movie folks. Language was a barrier and of course patience is a virtue when you speak a language that isn’t either of your first language (his Arabic, mine English, and Spanish is our spoken language). I have been amazed on how culturally different regions can be, especially when I am only 500 miles away from home. My big concern was that my boyfriend wouldn’t really get a sense of who I am because I feel like I express myself differently in English than in Spanish. There are phrases and vernacular that we use that I don’t know how to translate into Spanish. It was the most liberating and relaxed starting periods of dating a guy that I’ve ever had.
I eventually adapted to the Spanish lifestyle and became less uptight about planning and he understood that for bigger trips we had to make reservations and do all of those things in advance.



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