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June 16, 2014 by Shari 2 Comments The Not-So-Newlywed Game provides entertaining moments and a funny dose of honesty at your family reunion as three couples are pitted against each other. From big holiday traditions to the little pieces of daily living, we think life is better together! Understanding someone’s values can help you understand their actions, mental road maps, likes and dislikes in a very succinct way.
Now, I am not a moral cop, nor I am advocating you manipulate people, but since it happens all the time, by learning this process not only can you emotionally connect with people better, you can also prevent people from manipulating you.
Values can be detected by what people are attracted to or repulsed by and through a person’s actions (which is why you never listen to what a girl says she wants, you watch what she does). Your values exist deep in your unconscious – as a result, you may or may not be aware of what yours are – but they are the key to defining your basic personality and identity.
With that, your values and beliefs are the catalyst for your behaviors – both those you are consciously aware of and those you are not. We elicit or find out someone’s values by asking three questions that will help us understand their hierarchy and the primary value.

A round of questions determines how well the not-so-newlywed spouses know or do NOT know each other. Your audience (family members) will be more interested in sitting and watching if it follows some physical activity like playing volleyball. Which one of the following Valentine’s Day gifts would your wife prefer the most: a beautiful bouquet of flowers, you cleaning the entire house, a one hour massage, or jewelry?
The husbands will have their stack of posterboard answers and they will show if the answer was correct or not.
How you use this is completely up to you, but this is a deep step to emotionally bond with another human. Values are broad concepts that guide your decisions in life; they determine what is important to you, and they are the foundation of your character. What the conscious mind deems important is not always the same as what the unconscious mind values. Many guys have a sense of honor (white knighting) where they stand up for a female in a conflict with a different male, even if they don’t know her, she started the conflict and the man is justified in his treatment of her.

Values and beliefs can create cycles of behavior that may or may not be helpful to you; by changing or reorganizing the cause of behavior (your values) you will get results you do want.
Along the way you’ll learn more about grandpa and grandma’s courtship and quirks, have a few laughs, and hopefully no one ends up sleeping on the couch that night! This is also a great time to pass out a treat for people to enjoy while they watch the game show. After the first husband gives his answer, the wife lifts up the first card to show if he answered correctly or not.
Because individuals have different hierarchies of values, they experience life differently.
Override the conscious filter with a subconscious value and they will do whatever you want.

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