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We’ve compiled a list of body language tips to help you be the alpha male you want to be. Very few men consciously think about their body language or educate themselves on dominant, powerful, masculine body language. The great thing about alpha male body language is that it is something that can be learned and mastered.
Advanced body language should also include voice tone and other subtleties that help create a dynamic individual. Look forward or keep your head straight forward (you can turn side to side) when you want to give off a dominant vibe. If there’s one thing to take away from your hands, it is that if you are still exhibiting confident body language, your hands can do what they want.
Minor adjustments can gave you presence such as standing with your legs wider apart (shoulder width). Beta males on the other hand walk in quick short steps, always in a hurry to get from point A to point B. Please note that even if you are alpha or trying to be alpha, if you are in a rush (because there are times this happens) don’t be an idiot and think you should just walk slow. You will shake many hands throughout your life and probably even more if you are living the life of an alpha male.
Shaking hands is more than just grabbing someone’s hand and moving it up and down while exchanging pleasantries. The way you shake hands can give off a good impression of a dominant and powerful alpha male or you can come off as a submissive beta male that lacks authority and power.
If you run a team or an organization inhabited by alpha males, your challenge is to optimize their enormous productive capacity while at the same time get the upper hand on their risk factors before they create problems.
Most alpha males, of course, are in between those extremes, fluctuating between a terrific upside and a potentially devastating downside. The instrument we use to develop alpha profiles of individuals was also used to elicit basic data. Overall, our data show that alpha traits correlate with being male, with increasing levels of education, with low anxiety, with supervisory positions, and with type A personality traits. One of the most significant findings corroborates something we observed repeatedly in our work in organizations: alpha risks are closely related to alpha strengths. Commanders: Intense, magnetic leaders who set the tone, mobilize the troops and energize action with authoritative strength and passionate motivation without necessarily digging into the details.
Visionaries: Curious, expansive, intuitive, proactive and future-oriented, they see possibilities and opportunities that others sometimes dismiss as impractical or unlikely and inspire others with their vision. Strategists: Methodical, systematic, often brilliant thinkers who are oriented toward data and facts, they have excellent analytic judgment and a sharp eye for patterns and problems. Executors: Tireless, goal-oriented doers who push plans forward with an eye for detail, relentless discipline and keen oversight, surmounting all obstacles and holding everyone accountable for their commitments. You might say that all human beings can fit into those four categories, not just alpha males.
To cite ourselves as examples, we are both visionary alphas, but Eddie has strong secondary arms as both a commander and a strategist, while Kate has a lot of executor traits. In our experience, the most effective alpha leaders are those who blend the functional elements of more than one type - or are smart enough to surround themselves with associates who add the strengths of other types to the mix. You can see where all four styles have value, and that, depending on the circumstances, different combinations and proportions would be ideal. When told that their intimidating style can deplete morale and impair teamwork, alpha males typically become defensive. We illustrate the stark reality of the situation with what we call the awareness trajectory. Just as smoking constricts the arteries and erupts in any number of symptoms, dysfunctional alpha males can constrict the flow of energy, information, and creativity in an organization, causing damage that shows up both locally and system-wide. Once an alpha male recognizes the gap between his intentions and his actual impact, he becomes more amenable to feedback.
Because they think in bottom-line terms, alpha males become motivated to change only when they see that doing so will lead to greater influence and more sustainable business results. Each of the three roles perpetuates the alpha triangle: villains like to feel in control, victims need to feel wounded, and heroes love to feel honorable. Another way to break the triangle is to help alpha males respond less defensively to disagreement and critical feedback. You can use the scale to understand a particular alpha male's escalation pattern, as well asA your own and that of others who might be contributing to the problem.
As superheroes in their own minds, alpha males want to appear confident and strong, even invincible. Once they recognize that attempting to project a Superman image actually works like kryptonite in a modern workplace, weakening their ability to lead effectively, alpha males can be persuaded to let down their guard and be real. That's the kind of reflective, self-aware leader we encourage alpha males to become themselves. Make these simple adjustments to your body language and you’ll separate yourself from the masses of beta males. Here at To Be Alpha, we believe strong alpha body language is more about how you live your life and incorporates a lot of minor pieces that all add up to create a confidence, strong, attractive individual. But keep in mind that there are very few people that recognize their eye contact is beta or weak. Guys that have weak eye contact try to steal a peak but looking out of the corner of their eyes or look away when someone looks back at them. If you want to be alpha,  you need to be comfortable looking people in the eyes when you are talking to them, when you are listening and just in general. In order to be in a dominant position with eye contact, don’t break eye contact first when looking at someone. All the mainstream advice provided on alpha male body language just tells you to not look down, but look up. A lot of guys that seem to lack confidence or have good posture are hunched over (leaning forward). Don’t go crazy pushing your chest out or making an insane backwards c on your lower spine. Your hands alone do not convey much, but combined with other body language such as facial expressions, posture, or head positioning, they can make you look negative, insecure and shy.
Although many people will say never put your hands in your pocket because it looks like you’re hiding something, they are wrong. If you are using poor negative beta body language then your hands can convey that you are a beta male and the characteristics associated with a beta. If you decide to put your leg on top of another it should always be ankle over knee and not knee over knee (this is too feminine).
The art of shaking hands is essential if you want to come off as alpha when you greet someone. Whether they're larger-than-life legends who run giant companies or the heads of little-known firms and small departments, these aggressive powerhouses are hardwired for achievement and eager to tackle challenges that others find intimidating. When used appropriately, their courage, confidence, tireless energy, and fighting spirit make them natural leaders in competitive situations. We have written about them extensively and have conducted a rigorous study of their assets and liabilities.

You need to harness their competitive drive while keeping them from turning teamwork into guerrilla warfare and colleagues into stage hands for their one-man show. The negative half consists of behaviors that lead to everything from minor business problems to full-fledged organizational catastrophes and personal disasters. The job of those who coach and manage these alphas is to help them move further to the positive end of the continuum.
Even though a great many women in leadership positions possess the same fundamental traits, alpha males receive the bulk of attention for two primary reasons. The propensity for having alpha risks relates to being male, to higher levels of stress and tension, and to a lack of self-reflection. Although some subjects scored high on one scale and not on the other, in general the greater the strengths, the greater the risks. Exactly how it can is seen in Table 1, which lists common alpha traits, andA the value and risk associated with each one. To some extent that is true, but our concern is with alphas, and alphas bring to the four types an overlay of aggressive intensity, energetic persistence, and competitive drive that sets them apart from the rest of humanity.
While virtually every alpha has one dominant type PG, he or she will typically have one or two secondary patterns as well.
We both have big, expansive ideas, but Kate will offer practical comments about implementation challenges to justify her point of view, and she will persist until she can bring closure to the discussion. We have alpha clients enumerate their intentions in several categories, such as business outcomes, leadership results, and key relationships. They bully people to the brink of tears and then feel sorry for themselves for having to deal with such incompetents. And, because each player has a stake in keeping the triangle intact, the pattern is hard to break. Acknowledging that his volatility was impeding results, he requested our help and set forth to develop more constructive influence skills. Alphas tend to offer feedback in a coercive or belligerent manner, instantly putting the recipient into the victim role. Because they think they have all the answers, alpha males have a strong drive to explain, justify and convince. The higher the score on the (+) scale, the lower the defensiveness and the greater the openness to learning. They fear that if they don't come across as titans their credibility will be undermined and opponents will pounce like sharks that smell blood. Trying to maintain an image of perfection just keeps them at a distance from colleagues and feeds into their image as arrogant and self-important.
When they make that shift, they are well positioned to overcome the domineering, combative behavior that all too often pollutes the work environment and sabotages their best intentions.
Being a confident alpha male means not being afraid of looking at people or things they are interested in. The person that breaks eye contact first becomes more submissive than the individual that holds eye contact. Well a lot of beta males with poor body language will try to stand up straight but they fail at it because they don’t have the fundamentals or know how. If you combine hands in your pocket plus negative body language then yes this is poor form.
There are other times that you can fold your arms across your chest with one hand on your chin which is used for thinking. Also don’t sit with your legs too close together as this again, limits your presence. Those alphas who are balanced human beings in full command of their strengths are esteemed by colleagues, revered by employees, and adored by Wall Street. The main thrust of our consulting work - and of this article - is to help individuals and organizations harness the immense power of alpha males while minimizing their potential downside. And you need to take full advantage of their leadership gifts while protecting employees from their potential abuses. Alphas are aggressive, results-driven achievers who insist on top performance from themselves and others. First, men are more likely than women to have alpha characteristics, and the executive ranks contain many more alpha males than alpha females. In other words, the prototypical alpha is a well-educated man with managerial experience and the hard-driving, urgent intensity of a type A. It is that distinctive collection of traits that led us to use the term alpha male syndrome.
So, for example, a visionary alpha might also have strong strategist tendencies, while another visionary might have executor traits as a secondary characteristic. We then compare their intentions to their actual impact and examine the reasons for the gap between expectations and results.
We find the model very helpful in understanding the consequences of alpha behavior patterns - and in illustrating those consequences to the alphas themselves. We provide both verbatim passages from the interviews and color-coded bar graphs depicting how the client was rated in different areas of competency. Alpha males who turn their potent intelligence, energy, and determination inward are capable of remarkable transformation. Each lays claim to a specific payoff: villains get power, victims get sympathy, and heroes get appreciation.
Sometimes they also wear the hero costume, stepping courageously forth to put out the fire they started. As the various triangles within an organization become entrenched, the symptoms escalate from occasional traumas and minor annoyances to chronic disorders and outright catastrophes. His staff cowered in fear, his peers tuned him out, and everyone in the company tiptoed around him. The alpha triangle soon collapsed, and the performance of the entire group ratcheted up a notch. The victim defends himself or herself either passively, with nervous explanations and timid justifications, or aggressively, by counterattacking or shifting the blame.
A high score on the (-) scale indicates the opposite: a lot of defensiveness and a mind closed to learning.
The basic task is to shift each person's behavior from the high scores on the minus side to the high scores on the positive side. But, as paradoxical as it may seem, when strong, successful leaders are candid about their human frailties, they're actually seen as more self-confident and courageous.
On the other hand, when they openly expose their personal foibles, they show everyone another side of themselves - one that is self-aware, humble, and eager to improve. In our experience, companies that place a premium on open­ness and self-awareness are more creative, more energetic, and more profitable. At that point they are positioned to harness their magnificent alpha power, energy, and competitive drive for the benefit of their careers and their organizations. If your goal is to be alpha, you never want someone to view you as weak or insecure, even with your facial expressions. Just think about your world leaders, do you think they are in a rush or do they know that people will wait for them? In order to give off a dominant, confident and powerful impression as an alpha male you want to be the complete package.

Such skills do not come naturally to most alpha males, and those who fail to develop them are increasingly out of place. As you'll see, doing that requires more than simply building on the alpha's formidable strengths. Courageous and self-confident, they are turned on by bold, innovative ideas and ambitious goals, and they pursue their objectives with tenacity and an urgent sense of mission.
The most troublesome alphas are men who are under a high degree of stress and are not inclined to introspection. The data from our Alpha Assessment study support the observation that alphas display the qualities of one primary type, but also possess traits of the other three in varying degrees. Before bringing out the data, he appeals to the emotions by describing the impact his idea will have on other people.
They don't realize that the skills that got them to the playoffs are not enough to take them to the championship. Typically, high-ranking alpha males have more than enough knowledge, skill, and drive to be effective leaders.
These reports carry tremendous weight with alpha males, because they are typically oriented to hard data.
Periodically, Walt would take his complaints to the CEO, an inspiring alpha who loved the role of hero. They actually command more respect than those who strut around with their chests puffed up, afraid to show a chink in their armor. Such candor builds trust, respect, and loyalty, making their working relationships far more productive and raising their leadership capacity to new levels. They inspire fear and resentment rather than trust and respect, often causing expensive problems for their companies. It also means taking an unflinching look at how their assets can mutate into liabilities, with the potential to destroy careers and spread like viruses to teams, divisions, and entire companies. At their best, alpha males inspire awe, and their noble leadership skills are revered by others. While alphas of both sexes are aggressive, competitive, and prone to anger, the male of the species is far likely to become ruthless, intimidating, and belligerent. High alpha scores correlate strongly with anger, impatience and competitiveness, and the scores for anger and impatience are significantly higher in men than in women. Understanding their nuances will give you deeper insight into yourself and the alpha males around you, enabling you to pinpoint strengths you can build upon and risks you need to address. Although each type is statistically unique, there is an approximate 20 percent correlation between them.
The wild card is their self-awareness (vertical axis) and their awareness of how they influence their peers, teams, and other key players (horizontal axis).
The next step is also a powerful motivator: we facilitate meetings between the client and those who are struggling to work with him. Their noble intention is to get things done, but when they pursue that goal with blunt instruments the people they think they're helping actually feel like victims - misunderstood, mistreated, and maybe even abused.
He would soothe the wounded victims and negotiate their differences with Walt, and eventually sanity and calmness were restored. If the opponent is also an alpha, the result is war, even at the expense of mutual interests. That's why we strongly encourage alpha males to be fully transparent about what they learn about themselves and publicly affirm their ongoing commitment to personal growth.
Ask him to imagine a scenario in which his boss has problems with how the alpha has executed certain directives, which he, the alpha, considered too vague to follow.
The gripes we hear have usually been part of the corporate milieu for some time, consuming far too much employee time and energy. These common observations were borne out in our research: men scored much higher than women on virtually all measures of alpha risk factors (see the sidebar, The Hard Data on Alphas).
With this more granulated view, you can home in on a specific course of action, just as a doctor can devise a better treatment plan if she knows the exact type of infection a patient has rather than only the broad category.
Someone who's not an alpha is not likely to fight back, but rather slink away in self-defense, pretending to get the point.
Then have him imagine the boss storming into his office, slamming the door, and letting loose a barrage of demeaning remarks. Disappearing with them, however, are all the useful facts and important viewpoints they would otherwise contribute. Finally, have him imagine instead that the boss calmly says, "I'm aware that I'm not doing a very good job communicating what I'm looking for. What set Sean apart from us was his alpha male attitude and body language.I told myself that if I wanted to become an alpha male, I should follow his example.
Also gone is the alpha male's opportunity to garner support, help people learn, and bolster incentive. I have a sense of how it should be done, and I really want you to execute it, but you obviously can't read my mind.
With this “certain something” sometimes you’re born with it, but if you’re not that doesn’t mean you can’t learn something and change. If you answered no to any of these questions, you have to work on your posture and attitude.Visualize yourself as a masculine man, who feels powerful. By doing this alpha male behavior, you’ll be giving a subconscious signal to others that you’re not afraid to attack.Place your feet apart, a little wider than shoulder width.
Keeping your legs apart emphasizes your sexual strength.Keep your head confidently up and look straight ahead, not over or away from people, and not at their feet. Catch up on some old movies and acquire some basic notions on how a true gentleman behaves: how to smoke cigarettes, let a woman enter the room first, take her coat and etc.
It all depends on the situation but it’s always better to have too good of manners than to seem, well… ignorant.An alpha feels 100% manly so he likes to make it known who the man in the relationship is on each date. He doesn’t have to say it, but women simply feel that he’s the strongest.Talk to a lot of women, not so good-looking and pretty, older and younger.
Becoming an alpha male is a complex process and changing your body language is just part of it.
Take care of your body to look as good as you can so you can carry yourself with confidence and feel great in your own skin. He provides tips on how to exercise and eat well, boost energy and feel confident in your own skin. He believes a healthy body and successful social interactions are two main keys to happiness. I laugh to myself all the time when I see frankly little dudes lumbering with their arms out, guys half my size. Just work on yourself, be honest about areas you can improve, and put your best foot forward.
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