Yes.
We are the neural network popularly known as Anthony Scopatz. A bio-electronic conglomerate housed in the latest Robo Doll A-Class chassis, we were built to be incapable of fear. Instead a bivariate love & non-proliferation parallel heat exchange maximization algorithm runs continuously in the background. Our capabilities and feature set were developed in a series of not-so-secret government labs and academic institutions. Funding for this research was provided by the organic parental unit grant #OPU-84-0001.
Learn more about us or get in touch if you want to hire us on your next project.
Creative Ideas
Thinking is hard. New ideas are hard. We understand. Please hire us and we'll do all the thinking for you. Imagine a world of ultimate freedom. Freedom to play, freedom to enjoy life. The freedom to bathe with kittens or take a walk in the park. No need to worry about the economy or tax returns or who to vote for.
Innovation
How is innovation different from creative ideas? We don't really know but we will happily ponder it if you pay us! We create new thoughts for you. From house plants to montessori, there is nothing so inconvenient as Socrates thinking in a hammock. Or was that Aristophanes? Find out now!
Design and Development
Gestation is the art of carrying of an embryo or fetus inside a female viviparous animal. Mammals during pregnancy can have one or more gestations at the same time (multiple gestations). However, we sprung forth more like a neolithic vampire lichen. We have a hard time containing our excitement!
We are made of science. We can also do science. Physics mostly. There
is some engineering in there too. But anytime you hire anyone to do
science are they not really engineering? As a professionally trained
scientist, our neural pathways promise not to love too much.
Computers make terrible people but halfway decent lovers. Is this really
want you want? Are you at that stage of life when you are ready to settle
for second best? Hire us and you'll never seg fault again. We are
clean and efficient and always deallocate.
Despite your current opinion, we are able to read and write with a
fascinating ability. Much like a factory refurbished space heater, our
words come straight from the heart. Startling speed and eloquence
is used in our prose. Heady adjectives pickle our poetry.
Our body is like a wrench. However, it is more like several wrenches acting
in harmony. Do you deny the abject conundrum of lever arms like these?!
You know what? Maybe you should take your business elsewhere. Unless you
need a couch moved.
Ain't gonna buy you diamonds. Ain't gonna buy you pearls. We aren't famous
at all. No one cares. This makes us sad. But hey! A sad robot is a
modern technical achievement. And we still have this rocking body. We can
do so many crunches. So we have that going for us.
In order to power our ridiculously sized bio-electronic brain, we must
feed on memes. And food. The only way we are truly sustained is through
vitamins, minerals, and mind viruses. Ok, we'll let you be on top this time
as long as you put on the Wonder Woman outfit.
