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c h i k k a
l a u g h t r i p
ILLUSTRATION
ROB CHAM
Tim Tayag relives childhood nightmares to bring
you the usual suspects of local horror
Monsters, Inc
AN OLD
crone by day who, come nightfall,
turns into a beautiful woman — with wings.
She walks out of the shadows, wings
flapping, then takes to the air and splits
herself, much like Voltes V after a robo-fight,
in half. Stories of this creature have made
many Filipino kids gasp, curl up under the
blankets, and stay up wide-eyed all night
waiting to hear that sound she allegedly
makes before she attacks. For those who
don’t know: this female nocturnal monster is
called a
manananggal,
and it has a massive
appetite for babies in mothers’ wombs.
Such is the imagination that informs the
Philippines’ rich folklore. It’s rife with such
creepy creatures and other supernatural
beings. And while many of us think of
these creatures as past childhood torments,
they’re alive and well and still frightening
in the provinces. In the city, not so much,
possibly because of the steep rent that costs
an arm and a leg (pun intended). But you
still need to watch out for them.
THE
TIYANAK
This is a baby that’s an adult. Doesn’t make
sense? Imagine if a baby grew up but
remained a baby and never wants to move
out and get a job. This is that monster. The
myth is the tiyanak lives in the forest and
attracts its victims by mimicking a baby
crying. Once the clueless victim picks
up the baby, it then turns into a monster,
Chuckie-style, and attacks the victim with
its claws. The only way to escape is to
wear your clothes inside out and not to fall
for the crying baby, which is what I do at
night when my baby daughter cries.
THE
MANANANGGAL
This is the original Batman. This creature
is said to separate its upper body at night
and flies out using large, bat-like wings. It
feeds on fetus — no, not
balut
—
but actual
human fetus from a pregnant woman. The
tongue of the manananggal elongates into
a thread and goes into the pregnant woman
to suck out the fetus, usually chased with
a bottle of beer. The lower body stays on
the ground, vulnerable. To kill it, you must
put salt or garlic on the lower body so it
cannot unite with the upper body. Once the
upper body lands from exhaustion, you can
capture it and make manananggal
adobo,
which is believed to be an aphrodisiac.
THE
KAPRE
This is the Filipino version of the Yeti or
Bigfoot. This gigantic creature lives in trees,
smokes cigars, and chases women like an
unemployed bum living off his parents. The
kapre is unique from the other supernatural
creatures because it is not necessarily
hostile. In fact, he can be friendly if you
don’t make jokes about his being stinky
and his big dirty toes. But if his stench is
unbearable, you can tie a goat around the
tree he lives in. The goat’s poop will be
enough to mask the kapre’s own odor and
might even drive him to move trees.
Pinoy
Here are the usual
suspects. Their crime?
Causing many
sleepless nights
