HEMISPHERESMAGAZINE.COM
•
NOVEMBER 2012
•
ILLUSTRATIONS BY DAVID SPARSHOTT
95
Celebrity-
Spotting
A maneuver involving a
slackening of the jaw and an
extending of the index finger,
coupled with a variation on the
phrase “Oh my God, it’s Heidi
Klum!”; may result in injury if
practiced at high speeds.
At the Jerome Hotel’s
J-Bar, in Aspen, Colo.,
“
the most uncool thing
you can do is ask a celeb-
rity for an autograph,”
says hotel general man-
ager Tony DiLucia. This is
partly why celebs from
John Wayne to Johnny
Depp have felt comfort-
able planting their
elbows on the ornate
Chippendale bar at this
circa-1889 watering
hole. Though the Jerome
is reopening in Decem-
ber after a redesign, the
J-Bar remains largely
untouched (save for
some new furniture and
a lick of paint). Certainly,
no one is in a hurry to
change the spirit of the
place. “All are welcome,”
says DiLucia, “and all are
treated the same.”
Bunny
Slope
A semi-tilted area where
inexperienced adults fraternize
with toddlers while enduring
the smirks of onlookers;
an inescapable rite of passage
for most skiers.
Nowhere is the rookie
skier’s sense of ignominy
more acute than on the
dreaded bunny slope. And
Ski le Gap’s Bruce Eaves
,
a veteran instructor at
the excellent Quebec
school, has seen it all in
his 42 years of teaching:
the tumbles, the tears, the
slow-motion pileups. One
thing he’s learned is to not
be openly amused by such
spectacles—the prospect
of ridicule being a major
terror for the uninitiated,
second only to unexpected
contact with trees. So
Eaves’ first step in ge ing
his students off the bun-
nies is to lighten the mood.
“
If people are having fun,”
he says, “they’re going to
learn be er.” The next
step, not surprisingly, is
addressing the running-
into-a-tree issue. “Ge ing
speed under control is a
big priority for us.”
Après
Literally, “a er” (Fr.). Refers to
non-slope-related activities,
especially eating, drinking and
bragging endlessly about one’s
exploits on the trails.
Should you happen to spot
a burly bartender wearing
a baby-pink cowboy hat
at the
Million Dollar
Cowboy Bar
,
chances
are he’s being punished.
“
The staff has decided
that on Sunday nights
they should wear cowboy
hats,” explains Charlee
Starr, a 20-year employee.
“
If you show up to work
without a hat, you have
to wear a pink one.” This
fabled Jackson Hole, Wyo.,
institution—it’s been
around in one form or
another since the 1930s—
doesn’t take its Wild West
theme too seriously. The
barstools are made of
saddles and the place
is clu ered with what
its owner speculatively
refers to as “artifacts.” The
music, however, is another
ma er. Willie Nelson has
performed here, as have
Tanya Tucker, Waylon
Jennings and Hank Wil-
liams Jr. And if your legs
can handle it a er a day on
the slopes, there are even
lessons in how to execute
the après two-step.
A
