There's no medicine better than Love Hurts first aid to console you when youa€™re afflicted with a bad case of heartbreak. The views expressed in the contents above are those of our users and do not necessarily reflect the views of MailOnline. But there were a vast array of terrible dangers out there, so the British government’s Central Office of Information peppered advertisement breaks during children’s programming with oft-repeated short films designed to advise us on how to negotiate the veritable minefield of deadly obstacles.
Here are ten Public Information Films (or PIFs) which guided (or terrorised) us towards common sense. My uncle was a farmer and always made sure my brothers and I were aware of the hazards when visiting him at work (‘Hay Bale Fort’ was banned before it even began). The film has a bizarre, dreamlike quality to it: despite the carnage going on around them, the adults appear not to notice anything wrong, let alone do anything to help, and the kids themselves, engaged in a game of cowboys and Indians, recover all too quickly from the shock of seeing their peers die horribly. While Rolf Harris’ water safety campaign was all gentle anecdotes and beard-splashing fun with the emphasis very much on learning to swim, this darker campaign was deliberately designed, like a low-rent Jaws, to scare kids away from water altogether. PIFs would have us believe that the countryside was not so much a green and pleasant land but rather a wasteland of substations, pylons and power cables just waiting for you to get close so they could unleash their evil death-rays on you.
Although a large proportion of PIFs were directed at children, many also played on the fears of adults. Alvin Stardust, Kevin Keegan and even the third Doctor were among the celebrities who taught us about the dangers of playing with the traffic in the 70s, but none are as fondly remembered as the superhero-cum-lollypop-lady Green Cross Man. Most memorable of all though was the fact that he was played by none other than Darth Vader himself, David Prowse. In the innocent 70s and 80s, we were rarely told the reasons why strangers wanted to take us away from our mummies or what harm they might do to us back at their lair, but we were, thanks to PIFs like this, fully aware of the trickery they employed to get us in their car. The Charley series, aimed at pre-school children, would normally focus on the rewards for avoiding hazards.
So beloved are the Charley shorts that they were not only voted the UK’s favourite PIF but also managed to get into Channel 4’s 100 best ever cartoons poll. The Railway Children (the literary characters, not the band) would have you believe that train tracks are a fun place to spend a long summer’s day - but British Transport Films set out to tackle this assumption head on with their own series of distressing films which, like Apaches, were shown extensively in schools.
Robbie tells the story of a football enthusiast who trespasses on the tracks with, as expected, terrible consequences. Despite no recorded human deaths in almost three quarters of a century, they had us believing that if just one infected creature got loose in the UK, it would only be a matter of days before we were either stockpiling bottles of Perrier and barricading our homes against rampaging hoards of small furry creatures, or transforming into foam-mouthed, bitey hydrophobes. Perhaps the most chilling PIFs ever created, the Protect & Survive series was intended to be released to UK citizens if an outbreak of nuclear war seemed likely within 72 hours. Although thankfully never broadcast, it nevertheless inspired Cold War themes in popular culture for decades through the likes of drama (Threads, Spooks) comedy (Only Fools & Horses, The Young Ones), film (When The Wind Blows), videogames (Fallout 2) and even the Frankie Goes To Hollywood hit Two Tribes, for which Allen re-recorded many of his iconic lines (plus some new ones).
Visit Paul’s Youtube playlist for all the videos mentioned in this article plus other classic PIFs from the period.
COMEDIAN Bill Bailey is fronting a beard-growing campaign to raise funds for orang-utans in Indonesia. The hairy comedian believes the cause is worth an itchy chin We can make an impact on the survival of orang-utans Bill Bailey The hairy funnyman is promoting the Sumatran Orang-utan Society’s (SOS) Ape-ril campaign, which calls on people to show solidarity with the rare apes by growing beards. SIMON Cowell revealed that he got into a bust-up with Cheryl's ex Jean-Bernard Fernandez-Versini backstage at the X Factor. TWO nuns have revealed how a depraved Islamic State fanatic “smiled” at them before brutally slitting the throat of an elderly priest in France.
Learning to play a musical instrument is not only great fun, but it can also improve your child’s academic ability.
Everyone enjoys music and we believe that all children should have the chance to learn to play a musical instrument.
Only 21% of the UK population (aged over 5 years) plays an instrument but, amazingly, there are over 15 million people that wish to learn or get back to playing!   Music is an essential part of the fabric of our lives. A ten year study indicated that students who study music achieve higher test scores regardless of socio-economic background. Students who participate in a school band or orchestra have the lowest levels of current and lifelong use of alcohol, tobacco and illicit drugs among any group in our society. At Music for All, we spend all our time taking music making directly to the general public, either in schools, shows or town centres.
We recently visited 6 primary schools in the Forest of Dean and gave all the children experiences on a range of brass instruments. We also helped a school based near Brighton that had no instruments and no children learning. We are often asked about how to choose an instrument and what to look out for when buying one. So……can our charity help your child’s school to get more of the pupils enjoying the substantial and wide ranging benefits of music making? Please type the letters and numbers shown in the image.Click the image to see another captcha.

Contracted stars Najarra Townsend(Geek USA), Caroline Williams(Hatchet 3, Halloween 2),Katie Stegeman(Madison County), Charley Koontz(Community, Rubber), and quite a few others. The Bell Witch Haunting is a found footage film based on the famous Bell Witch Haunting that was also the basis of the film An American Haunting. All The Boys Love Mandy Lane stars Amber Heard( Machete Kills, Drive Angry), Edwin Hodge(The Purge, Cougar Town), Whitney Able(Monsters, Unearthed), Luke Grimes(True Blood, Taken 2), Michael Welch( Hansel and Gretel Get Baked, Twilight), Anson Mount(Hell on Wheels, Red Widow), and a few others. Gallowwalkers stars Wesley Snipes(Blade, Game of Death), Kevin Howarth( Summer Scars, The Last Horror Movie), Riley Smith(90210, Eight Legged Freaks) and more.
Stalled stars( and was Written by) Dan Palmer( Freak Out, Small Town Folk), Victoria Broom(Deranged, Zombie Women of Satan), Tamaryn Payne(Hollyoaks, Small Town Folk) and a few others.
Lili Taylor( The Haunting, The Conjuring), Bill Skarsgard()Anna Karenina, Victoria) and lots of others. Absentia Stars Courtney Bell and Katie Parker, also a small role by Doug Jones(John Dies At The End,Legion). In fact, Love Hurts may even be better than crying on a girlfriend's shoulder because it lightens a heavy heart. Like today’s kids, we had computer games, great films and TV shows, amazing music and incredible toys but, on top of those distractions, we were also no stranger to leaping on our BMX and pedalling off in search of a day long, school holiday adventure.
Of course, they didn’t so much advise as traumatise us into behaving with their horrific scenes of misguided unfortunates befalling gruesome fates as a result of their own stupidity.
However, some kids saw the farmyard as an obstacle-course of adventure, so this half hour film was commissioned, and shown in schools, to put paid to this dangerous behaviour. A spooky twist ending, revealing Danny to be a ghost awaiting his own wake, plus a closing credits sequence listing the names and ages of children killed in actual farmyard accidents (some as young as two years old) makes this PIF macabre viewing. Horror legend Donald Pleasance gives voice to the villain, the Spirit of Dark and Lonely Water, a ghostly, monk-like figure who stalks reckless and unwary youngsters, waiting for his moment to drag them down into the depths of reservoirs, quarries and other dark, lonely and watery places.
Outdoor pursuits like sailing, fishing, kite flying and, perhaps most famously, playing Frisbee each received their own electricity awareness film, but this PIF went one step further than most by not only frazzling the foolish Darren, who breaks into a substation to steal a football, but also his concerned sibling who only tries to help his stricken big brother. Each one addresses a clear and present danger, but I can’t really imagine any real person reaching the same heights of idiocy as the hapless fool who must have inspired the creation of this one. His super-computer would alert him to a child about to commit a lethal road-crossing faux-pas so he would teleport in, often aided by his robot sidekick (who looked like the love child of Metal Mickey and a bottle of Night Nurse), direct the child to safety and give them a good dressing down, while warning the viewer to “Always use the Green Cross Code, because I won’t be there when you cross the road”. Prowse magnanimously supported the ad campaign with countless school appearances – including my primary school where he delivered a Green Cross Code assembly and afterwards gave me a personal snippet of road safety advice whilst signing my 1983 Return Of The Jedi annual. Offers of sweeties, lifts home from school, news of sick relatives or cute furry animals were all ruses which set our Stranger Danger alarm bells ringing. Like a feline Jiminy Cricket, the eponymous Charley acted as a conscience to Tony, his seven-year-old owner. Although not official COI films, the BTF’s own shorts are often lumped in with them by fans of the genre as they contain the same themes of unwitting youths in dire straits (the dangerous situation, not the band) and doom foreshadowing synth soundtracks. Three different versions of film were shown with alternate middle sections, each showing a different danger to be found on the railway, but all resulting in the same cruel, ironic twist: Robbie receives life changing injuries meaning he can never play the beautiful game again. On one hand we got to hire out the likes of Herbie Goes Bananas or an anime import I’d never heard of (although the cover looked cool) but, for some inexplicable reason, to get to the children’s section you had to first go through Horror (in more than one sense of the word).
The message was clear – don’t smuggle animals from abroad or the only thing that will be able to save us is Brad Pitt. Voice-over royalty Patrick Allen narrated the simple animations (made by the team behind Charley) with his authoritative tone providing advice ranging from pointless (hide in a ditch and cover your eyes) to sinister (how to bag, tag and bury the dead). We are the “Music for All” charity and all our efforts are directed towards our mission of “Making More Musicians”, especially children. It is an extremely powerful means of communication, playing a role in many of our social institutions and religious rituals. We offer free “taster” lessons on a range of instruments and give people a real experience of playing music. There are many community brass bands in the area and we worked with them so that the children could both be excited about learning a brass instrument and aware of where their local band was.
We were able to help with some instruments and the school now has children learning both violin and clarinet. We recently produced a guide called “Quality Instruments for Education” and this is available as a download or in a booklet. A young girl is date-raped by a stranger at a party and contracts what she thinks is a sexually-transmitted disease – but is actually something much worse. Being low budget the actors are all unknown , but that’s not bad really since the acting was probably the best thing about this film! A group of high-schoolers invite Mandy Lane, a good girl who became quite hot over the summer, to a weekend party on a secluded ranch. A mysterious gunman, Aman, is the son of a nun who breaks her covenant with God to ensure his survival. When an island off the coast of Ireland is invaded by bloodsucking aliens, the heroes discover that getting drunk is the only way to survive.

The film stars Sean Clement(Black Coat Mod, Flashpoint, Jordan Hayes( Exit Humanity, House at the End of the Street), Devon Bostick( Survival of the Dead, Saw VI) and quite a few others.The scientist Susan Carter is researching the rehabilitation of addicts using an experimental drug in her rehab center.
Narrator Danny introduces us to his trespassing friends whilst referring back, throughout the film, to a party his parents are preparing for.
When sensible children, his nemeses, rescue a foolish child from his clutches the Spirit melts away, Obi-Wan style, leaving only his cloak behind. The over-the-top pyrotechnics leave us in no doubt as to the unfortunate nipper’s fate – all that’s missing from the special effects team’s heavy handed tactics to drive the message home is a pair of empty plimsolls with smoke rising out of them. John grabs his coat and heads off into the night with his rowdy, cajoling chums to get up to, well, we don’t know what.
Not only does Andy discard a still smouldering match with little regard for where it lands, but he keeps his Beanos in the one place guaranteed to make seasoned comic collectors weep into their storage bags. After catching Tony engaging in a dangerous act of folly, Charley (voiced by Kenny Everett) would deliver a safety lecture in moggy talk which the boy would then translate for the non-cat-speaking viewers whilst ceasing his perilous activity. To drive the message home with a final blow, we are left with a closing shot of the poor kid’s sad, unused football boots hanging on the back of his bedroom door. Whilst the Betamax covers for Shriek Of The Mutilated and Cannibal Holocaust still haunt my dreams to this day, it was the artwork for Zombie Flesh Eaters which really put the willies up me. The whole idea of Protect & Survive was so alarming to a generation who grew up in the constant shadow of Armageddon that it beat Dracula in Channel 4’s poll of the scariest things ever. That’s got to be worth an itchy chin.” Women and children can take part using false beards, with prizes for the best photos sent to the campaign’s Hairy Hall of Fame online gallery. We often hear from people who think they “are not musical”….it is amazing to see how they feel once they have an instrument in their hands and are playing notes! It is filled with guidance about all the major instrument types and offers sensible advice of what to look out for and what to ask. The story follows Dusty, a yoga instructor from Colorado, who is on a desperate rescue mission to save her crazy brother Derek, a conspiracy theorist who is convinced Osama bin Laden is still alive, despite having been buried at sea. After her death, her idle son Brian Carter is forced by his friend Simon to travel to the property that he had inherited.
Her younger sister Callie comes to live with her as the pressure mounts to finally declare him dead in absentia.
The pesky kids then proceed to get into a series of increasingly graphic scrapes with agricultural equipment until only one remains.
Although he was beaten this time his parting threat of “I’ll be back!” reverberated in the ears and minds of terrified viewers for many years afterwards. The spark of doubt is stoked into a raging fire of mistrust in the minds of suspicious grown-ups by the closing caption accompanied by the sound of breaking glass. Carelessness with matches is one thing, but equally I would have never treated my prized tomes with such contempt (it was just bad timing that I threw up all over mine during an accidental Sherbet Fountain overdose). Sometimes Charley would become the victim of Tony’s mischief but thankfully, in this instance, under his pet’s expert guidance Tony says “No” to the duffle-coated, puppy-promising, potential paedophile and they are rewarded with an apple for Tony and a fish for Charley.
Even the reassuring presence of children’s TV favourites Peter Purves or Keith Chegwin (depending on whether you saw the original or the 1986 edit) could not stop classrooms full of kids from being traumatised into getting the message. It’s hard to believe in these post Warm Bodies times that in the 70s and 80s zombies really were the terrifyingest of movie monsters, and it’s that same vibe that the makers of the rabies awareness PIFs were going for. It also teaches children to manage information, think and solve problems, be adaptive, learn continuously and to work well with others. Brian and Simon travel with five other friends to the spot and they find that the center is actually an ancient monastery and they have to spend the night. As Tricia sifts through the wreckage and tries to move on with her life, Callie finds herself drawn to an ominous tunnel near the house.
The insinuation is vandalism – but he could be going to take hot meals to homeless puppies for all we know. Involvement in music can reinforce self-discipline, teamwork, creativity and self-expression. Turns out Derek is not so crazy after all, and that Osama has returned from his watery grave and is making an army of zombie terrorists. Music is an important element of education that allows students to have the best possible start in life. The skills learnt in making music may help in other areas of school life: better concentration, increased creativity, self esteem and self discipline. Also, children who receive music lessons have shown improved social skills, greater self-reliance and more positive attitudes.

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