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Fashion forward and beauty oriented, always interested in whatever is trendy and hot hot hot! John Clark and Michelle Rhodes relax in their Toronto townhouse on Sunday, September 18, 2012.
The answer: For all of us, what we value and want in life is shaped significantly by our past experiences. My parent bug me constantly and have comments like why should he have to buy the cow when he gets the milk for free.
First off let me reiterate what I’ve said in other posts:  there is very little you can do to “get” him to propose. Clearly you would like to get engaged, but for some reason he isn’t working on the same time line as you are. Until that magical day comes there is something very simple, but very effective you can do to relieve some of your anxiousness:  Realize the good things in your life, more than the not-so-good things. To greater or lessor extent, we all suffer from too much “future-think,” and not enough “what’s good about right now?” Having dreams and goals is great, maybe even necessary, but don’t forget to enjoy where you are as you move toward them. You have a child, a home, a pending graduation, your parents, most likely your health, and a man to love who appears to love you in return. So often we miss the good things sitting at our feet because our minds are stuck on a future that seems better than where we are now. The man msy feel all the liberty with him to remain at this present comfortable position, with no commitment and no responsibility to do so. Need relationship advice?  Send your questions to ronsimmsjr at gmail dot com and you might be featured on the next installment of Ask MISSter Simms.
I have to agree that he’s not ready but continually pressing him about marriage might just push him away.
Our history makes us who we are and – right or wrong – has a bearing on the future decisions we make.
Here is one from Ashley who has been waiting 3 years so far… See what Andy, our expert, has to say.
We wanted to wait until I finished college to get married but I will have my degree this December and still no proposal, even though I don’t want to get married right away after being engaged. Reasons why your spouse do not take the initiative could be rather complex and hard to explain. From proposal ideas to the perfect ring, couples preparing for their wedding engagement need to look no further than right here. Some people just don’t get down with the whole marriage deal and just live together forever. Enjoy the relationship while it’s fruitful and let all the work and magic happen on its own.
There’s no area in which this applies more than in our relationships.Humans are, to the core, social beings. He told me recently that I can go ahead and plan a wedding for us now but I just don’t feel right talking about wedding details when he hasn’t even asked me.

Little one can do except for one to give more leeway to the other party so there could, perhaps, be an about-turn to surprise you. Aside from your big day, popping the question is one of the most monumental moments in your relationship.
Maybe you two need to sit down and talk about your future together and where he sees it going vs you. Live life as it is with your normal self, and if it be necessary, go for a short distance break, without being together a while.
I know it’s gonna happen before February since his brother and sister inlaw are pregnent. Maybe you’re always around friends he chooses to avoid, or maybe simply because he cannot pick up the courage around a crowd you are always around. Family, friends and intimate relationships are all important, yet distinct elements in the social network that surrounds us.Of our varied connections, intimate relationships are perhaps the most complex, confusing and crazy-making.
When back together, perhaps,you can see changes, man could be more fond of you and any hints of getting him to propose to you is likely to knock him over to your side.However, there is no sure-fix ways to this,because to every situations is different and varies from individual to individual.
If you see him around, then try to stay alone for a while, he might just use the given opportunity.It is your job to make sure he is getting enough clues that the feeling is mutual. These are also the relationships that have the potential to bring us an immense happiness and joy.Unfortunately, today’s relationships are more complex (for a range of societal reasons) than the relationships of decades ago. Men aren’t really that smart when it comes to understanding signs, that’s why they call us complicated, so it’s better we play by their rules which benefits both ways. Make it obvious that you like him too, so that there is no room for confusion.Sometimes they take their own time just to decide how to approach. Many couples are able to come to a mutually acceptable decision to agree to disagree on important relationship points. It can serve as an unrelenting source of frustration when you seek to tie the knot, but he does not.
The bigger issue is the manner in which the two of you are communicating – or not communicating – about these differences.You make the assumption that his disinterest with marriage is reflective of his inability to get over his past.
It takes a great amount of courage to ask someone out, to fight the fear of refusal and combat the worry of stuttering.There might be barriers between you two which you are unaware of, he may have heard something about you and misunderstood you.
There are some obvious and not-so-obvious reasons why some men are reticent to take the plunge, as well as some of the factors that contribute to cold feet. In this case you might want to find out all he knows about you and clear all the misunderstandings if there are any.Perhaps the waiting is because he needs to be sure of what he wants. In that case why not flaunt your best qualities and show him what he’s missing while wasting his time thinking.The worst case scenario would be you misinterpreting his signals. Perhaps his experience was that the legal entity of marriage offered no added value to his past relationship?
He might not be thinking the same way about you and just taking you as a really good friend or maybe does not understand the friendly flirting is giving out wrong ideas.Some men do not go through the ‘asking out’ process because of the fear of commitment. Perhaps it added financial and logistical complexity that he does not want to deal with again in your current situation?

They are not ready to accept the feelings or might feel that they are going to lose their ‘mojo’ if they get into a commitment. Perhaps he perceived marriage as having a constraining, negative and destructive influence on his relationship?Conversely, does he understand (and have you been able to fully articulate) the reasons you want to get married again?
Arrogance might get in the way too in some cases; in this case they might be expecting us to ask them out.
Do you feel that marriage would offer you a commitment and stability that isn’t currently in your relationship? Further, because they can have sexual relationships with one or many partners without commitment, some men might not want to give up this freedom. Ask yourself if there are things he can do or say that would provide you the key elements you think marriage would offer. Another problem connected to the sexual component is that a man might feel that a woman's attitude is more masculine than feminine.
It could be that the bigger issue is not the difference of opinions on marriage, but other fundamental difficulties in your relationship that need to be solved.I would encourage you to have an open conversation about your positions on marriage. You both need to truly understand each other’s perspectives and ensure you have the same long-term vision of your relationship for it to work.
Remember that getting married is no guarantee that the relationship will be a fulfilling or lasting one – similarity and respect for your individual and joint values and goals are.Ultimately the issue of marriage may become a deal-breaker for one of you, but try to be open to the idea that you can both have what you want in a relationship in the absence of it.
Who knows, open conversation may even result in one of you making a willful shift in your ideals.Dr. She is the host of OWN: Oprah Winfrey Network’s Million Dollar Neighbourhood and is the psychological consultant to CITY-TV’s The Bachelor Canada. Your name will not be published if your question is chosen.The content provided in The Globe and Mail’s Ask a Health Expert centre is for information purposes only and is neither intended to be relied upon nor to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
Remaining single means that your partner does not take a heart-wrenching gamble on a happy ending. Consider a few of the perks of cohabiting including loving companionship, sex and the sharing of joys, sorrows and living expenses.
Serial cohabiters live with one woman for a period of time, end the relationship and move on to another partner without commitment.
She is an adjunct college instructor, licensed school psychologist and educational consultant. She holds a Master of Science in clinical psychology and a Doctor of Philosophy in educational psychology, both from Mississippi State University.

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