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August 15, 2012 By This Busy Life Leave a Comment What possibilities are awaiting you today?
Fresh sheets on the bed, especially when they have been dried by the sun, there isn’t much of a greater pleasure that that.
The voicemail I listen to after missing a call from a friend when she tells me that she nailed a presentation that she was worried about and thanked me for the small part I somehow held in helping her prep for this.
And as someone who has spent a number of years in large corporates, I get her advice and how meaningful this would be for women looking to build careers within the corporate structure. One of the studies that Sheryl refers to in her book is a study done at the Columbia Business School where an experiment was run to test perceptions of men and women in the workplace. And that’s a bit of an issue for us of the female gender who have pretty much been trained and socialised to be likable and agreeable our whole lives. And it is the radical feminists that probably made such a fuss that has caused the improvements in gender equality in the workplace over the past 40 years. The other area that interests me which she doesn’t really cover is around how self-employment is creating new opportunities for women outside the corporate structure. Since then over $230,000 has been raised for Caine’s college fund, people like Jack Black have brought their children to play in the arcade (and play themselves) and last October there was a global event called the Cardboard Challenge which had children participating from over 41 countries a year to the day that the “surprise party” had occurred to make Caine’s day.  Caine himself has grown in confidence, his stuttering has disappeared and he is doing heaps better at school. But it wasn’t the music itself that inspired Dave, “it was the blissful removal of these bands from any source of conventional, popular corporate structure, and the underground network that supported the music’s independence that was totally inspiring to me…. I don’t know what that is yet for this particular workplace and for these people that are bringing me my coffee.  But this is why I am undertaking The Purpose Project, because I would like to explore this. Janine Shepard was training to represent her country at the winter Olympics when she was hit by a truck, breaking most of her body, including both her neck and back and losing 5 litres of blood.
Her experience, and her technique of creating meaning  (using the goal of flying to re-learn how to walk which led to a whole new relationship with life and purpose), reminded me of the work by Viktor E. From his experiences, Dr Frankl determined that this sense of meaning is the primary motivation for life. Although Dr Frankl and Janine Shepard use different words to express these concepts, I believe they are coming from the same place. So how do we move from being inspired by stories of incredible beings like Janine Shepard and Dr Frankl, to understanding and knowing that we too have this ability to be incredible, to live who we really are. If you lead a church, an organization, a small business, or a family you need to be reminded the people following you desperately want and need to be led.
They need not be reminded of what is likely, apparent, or impending for those things are obvious to the average person. I am learning how important it is that when you give someone a responsibility, you have to give them the authority to carry it out. I am learning that you don’t want to wait too long to start moving the next phase of key leaders into those roles.


As I grow older and see young leaders spawning and seeing myself as I was in there young ambitions. I find it best in a lot of things just to be quiet, with just a nudge or a word here and there. Your comments are all so meaningful and important, and reinforce what motivated me to start FibroHaven over three years ago a€“ the need for a positive voice and community for people living with fibromyalgia and related chronic illnesses. Third, I am going to continue working on one of the missions I have always had for FibroHaven a€“ to open more support group chapters across the country.
Finally, I am going to continue to put my health and wellbeing first a€“ which is exactly what the Woman’s Day article was about, which is exactly how I began to heal, and which is exactly what I will always recommend for each of you. Meditation, exercise (yoga, climbing the treadmill, and P90X), finding excellent doctors who understand drugs are not the answer, and continuing to decipher why my health spiraled so out of control (in the hopes I can help others)…all of these things bring me joy instead of sorrow. Except perhaps in winter when it is soft flannelette sheets and the electric blanket warms my feet so I can sleep well and deep.
That this awesome talented woman owned her awesome-ness and delivered – that is pretty damn magical. He describes this as “This meaning is unique and specific in that it must and can be fulfilled by him alone”. I was spewing a bunch of information, that while truthful was not in the least bit helpful. They need you to define reality, but they also need you to practice the art of possibility. Even if only 20% of what went wrong is really on my shoulders, I take the responsibility and decide what I will do differently the next time.
My employees don’t need to see me as someone who thinks she can control it all and better yet they need the opportunity to see themselves achieve new things!
Giving them ownership, letting them learn from there mistakes, but helping to avoid total train wrecks.
I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the many positive responses I have received about the article I wrote for Womana€™s Day Magazine. This will involve a lot of time, research, and effort to determine the best way to proceed, but I am committed to this cause so look for more info in the future about new chapters of FibroHaven. I will continue to honor the times when I need to rest rather than write, when I need to practice yoga rather than work, when I need to have some quiet time rather than conversation.
This is just what we need – more main stream articles by real people who have the condition. I have had fibro for 16 years, and I have suffered the disbelief, the rudeness and obstacles, that all of us are exposed to. Before I read your wonderful article would make lists in my head of bad things about myself and what I didn’t get done.


I now choose to write about health versus what life is like being ill, and I no longer feel stuck. I’m so much more confident than I ever was in the past – even before Fibro and chronic pain came along! I learned to state the rules of the meeting, up front, that even if you think the idea is far fetched, unrealistic or there are clear obstacles, you do not kill the conversation (read: creativity) of that person by cutting down their idea with comments. I believe leaders who are authentic about failures garner higher levels of trust and make more progress in the long run.
Sometimes you leaders are offering solutions simply by being wise and caring enough to define our reality and live out your own so well. Thank you for inspiring me and recommitting me to my purpose, and to the purpose of FibroHaven.
We are each unique individuals, and we experience and process our symptoms differently, so my formula is my own, but we all share enough similarities in this condition that there is certain to be something in there to inform, inspire, and encourage you. Both are my passion, and I have combined the two with my local support group members a€“ offering group coaching for members to come together and begin transforming their lives from a place of Self Care, Integrity, Love, Purpose, and Possibility.A And now I am going to open this service up online so you do not need to be a member of my local group to work with me. What you see here on FibroHaven is the very best of me, and I am committed to always delivering my best.
I only follow others who are achieving wellness through proper diet (organic, whole foods) and exercise. But I know if I were to repeat old patterns (eating poorly, sedentary lifestyle, negative thinking, and focusing on my pain and what I can’t do), that those symptoms can and will creep back into my life. Groups will range in size from 4-6 participants and are a affordable way to lower the cost of working with a life coach. To fulfill on this commitment, I must always and forever be committed to my health and wellbeing first. You are a breath of fresh air, and in a moment when I began to despair that there would ever be a chance of happiness for me…that was the day I found Fibrohaven. It is like that old airline cliche – I must secure my own oxygen mask first if I am going to be able to help others secure theirs. If you are interested in learning more about group coaching or would like to reserve a spot, please send me a request and your information on my contact page form.



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