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I have a Little Factory, but for the first dozen years I didn't know what it was or what it did except for one very basic function.
On occasion it seemed to want to start up on it's own with the morning shift being the most active. In my mid-teen years the Little Factory was almost always in the fore front of my thoughts.
Even though magazines were around, I had never actually seen a real Loading Dock until I was married.
Many years later now, the Loading Dock is gone and the Little Factory has mostly shut down. I am grateful for the internet and this website so I can speak truthfully as a latter-day saint on a subject that I would otherwise receive social sanctioning for speaking out on. I neared puberty, I learned about intercourse, and dreamed of marrying a beautiful girl in the temple one day. He was the consummate Mormon boy who was dedicated to Christ far beyond the commitment of most boys. There is absolutely no evidence whatsoever that masturbation results in any physical, psychological, spiritual damage or unhealthiness. I have felt God’s presence and spirit with me as I have thanked him for the great gift of sexuality while masturbating, and while daydreaming of how much I love and am attracted to my beautiful wife. I have felt God’s spirit with me more, while masturbating with love, than in any church or temple. Editor's note: The Salamander Society is honored to post this wise, sensitive and timely material. Often an erotic dream is experienced at the same time, and is a part of this normal process.
Before my disaffection began to really gain much traction, I had what I'm sure was an opportunity to be bishop.
So yes, I'm convinced that most church leaders service themselves and feel a lot of guilt and shame over it.
I remember hearing at a youth fireside the scripture about cutting off the thing that offends god.
I once attended a priesthood leadership meeting that the First Presidency and Q12 conducted via satellite, around 2004. I was at BYU at the time, and I remember thinking, "Heck, if my Bishops are doing it, then why do they make me loathe myself for confessing something that they apparently do. Unfortunately, I still remained a TBM (True Believing Mormon) for several more years (till 2011). And i always assumed the reason I didn't advance in the church hierarchy was because I liked to play with my willie all the time. I think that since it is natural and healthy that just about everyone at least occasionally does it. I think that anything that says that the natural man is an enemy to god is a really damaging thing. The University of Notre Dame funded a study to see why the head of a man's Penis was larger than the shaft.
True to form, Elder Boyd K Packer's obsession with male sexual activity inspired him to direct his pet department at Brigham Young University to conduct their own "hands on" study. After 2 weeks and a cost of around $75.46, they concluded that it was to keep a man's hand from flying off and hitting himself in the forehead. Several graduate students who worked closely with Packer on the study surmised that the concave shape of Packer's own forehead creates the permanent scowl always found on his face, especially during General Conference.
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass. Masturbation in Christian Church is discouraged but not condemned, one Pastor from out of town came and talked to the Church members about Sex and Sexuality and mentioned masturbation , most of the children there got embarrassed, as they knew what he was talking about and realized that everyone else now knew they did it. How these people can get so involved in children s sexuality and sexual activity, sorry but if my son came home and said Dad someone at church asked me if i masturbated (what is masturbation would come next), I would wonder what that persons motive is.
I remember a Stake President talking about it during a conference, and I was sure he was directing it at me alone. When I finally did try to talk to my father, he exploded, pulled out "Mormon Doctrine," and read me the words of Bruce. LEHI, UT—Throughout his life, 22-year-old Hyrum Parkin has been a devout Mormon, attending services at the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in his hometown of Lehi, regularly participating at the Lehi 37th (YSA) Ward, Lehi Utah Stake. A part-time prep-cook and odd-job yardwork handyman when not serving as a Ward Missionary, the young Parkin has never had much time for socializing with members of the opposite sex.
Though his wedding date has yet to be set, Hyrum Parkin is so eager to discharge his little factory that he has already purchased his temple clothes and is waiting patiently at the Mount Timpanogos Utah Temple. Parkin cited his irresistible desire to achieve sexual climax and discharge his little factory without having to go to outer-darkness as the number one factor in his decision to propose marriage. Living his 22 years inviolate under strict LDS doctrine, Parkin has never discharge his little factory, for to do so outside the holy bonds of temple marriage would mean non-negotiable, eternal punishment upon death.
Burning with a desire to discharge his little factory so overwhelming that it has threatened to dwarf even his love for Christ, Parkin has, ever since puberty, researched the subject at length, discovering "five score and seventeen" different methods by which males can achieve ejaculation. While Parkin is greatly looking forward to marriage and the sweet release of sperm it will bring, he noted that even in holy wedlock, Mormon doctrine limits permissible ejaculation to just one circumstance: sexual congress for the purpose of procreation. LEHI, UT - Hyrum Parkin, the 22 year old handyman anxious to experience intimacy with a member of the opposite sex, finally achieved his goal last night, when he and his new bride Luann Parkin consummated their wedding vows in the Lehi Super 8 hotel, following their temple wedding earlier in the day. Luann Parkin refused to comment on the wedding night activities, but that didn't stop her new husband from sharing intimate details. I walk in to our living room where our family is cleaning up after the Xmas morning gift opening mele and my wife had a little figurine of three angels standing around singing Xmas carols.

We both looked at him like he was insane for saying something completely random and inappropriate like that. A gay friend of mine was told not long ago by his bishop that he brought his gay-ness upon himself by masturbating and thinking impure thoughts while doing so. I guess this means that if my gay friend will think only straight thoughts and fantasies while masturbating - and then repents of having masturbated - he will be both straight and free of the sin of masturbation. The Mormon Church uses the issue of male masturbation as a way of keeping honest men out of church leadership. This sytems works well for the church, because if a man will lie to raise in the ranks, what's he likely to do when confronted with the Book of Abraham or BoM DNA? I'm not sure if this system was set up intentionally, but it's pretty obvious if you've served a mission that this is how the church works. They are basically filtering out the kind of men who could be a problem later on: Guys who are candid about life and honest with others. Those elders who sincerely and honestly felt the need to repent were "held back" from serving in the position of a district leader (in most cases), Zone Leader or AP (in all cases). I served in the mission office and read the letters of those elders who were nearly suicidal from the guilt associated with masturbation. While at the time I wasn't as understanding (yes, I was caught up in being the shining leader), I would later come to understand the tragedy associated with this cycle of guilt. I have always hoped they were able escape the tentacles of this guilt-driven church and find some measure of peace. I think that there is a major point that can be made about regular church interviews creating an environment where members are encouraged to lie on a regular basis.
And it came to pass in the great frozen regions northward beyond the United States that I did partake of something unclean and my gastrointestinal tract was possessed by demons.
And it came to pass, after he had covered his nakedness with the garments of the holy priesthood and the uniform of righteousness, yea, even the sanctified conservative tie, he did throw himself upon my mercy, confessing his sins and weaknesses that I might forgive him and aid him in conquering the loathsome practice. When he had completed his lamentations and supplications, I spake unto him, saying, Brother, thou seekest forgiveness and strength from me, yet, varily, I shouldst seek the same from thee, for I am also unclean. As I entered my teen years I became aware that this Little Factory would sometimes make itself known in small subtle ways. Their Loading Docks are also multi-function but their biggest purpose is shipping and receiving. We needed the protection of the Union even though we knew that the Morg was against this protection. I had fun being the designated driver and felt I was doing my part protecting them from harm. Leaders have my faith and trust until they obviously and repeatedly abuse it unrightiously. I have the capacity to be highly self disciplined and have lived for periods in my life sexually abstinent as taught by the general authorities of the church.
The church has a continual history of mimicking popular conservative public opinion when it comes to masturbation.
They are taught to fight against the Lord’s healthy developmental process that is only designed to drive them toward healthy marital bonding and family life. There is an obvious difference in the social impact of various sexual behaviors, for example the extreme difference between masturbation and rape). His innocent blood cries out as a testimony against the false Mormon teachings about masturbation. Since my priesthood leaders acknowledged that the spirit was with me, this was a further witness to me that masturbation did not cause spiritual damage. Instead of course, the reproductive system is operating at a more rapid pace, trying to keep up with the loss of semen. Remember it is essential that a regular report program be agreed on, so progress can be recognized and failures understood and eliminated.
I think the SP was hopeful that I was just being too unforgiving of myself because he went into asking details about frequency. She had to make sure they arrived and left without anyone knowing they where there (different doors). What I still remember, all these years later, is that they talked extensively about porn and masturbation.
He kept asking for more and more details on every little act and every guy I had been with which at that time were too numerous to recall. I'm an old guy now, and don't have to worry about the big M problem since all machines and factories eventually wear out.
After 1 year and $180,000, they concluded that the reason that the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex.
After $250,000 and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the woman more pleasure during sex. What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.
Hyrum recently completed a honorable mission in the Canada Winnipeg Mission in which he ascended to an assistant to the Mission President. Nevertheless, last week, Parkin announced his intention to marry fellow, Mormon Luann Ruth Harker, also a member of the Lehi 37th (YSA) Ward, whom he met at a church-sponsored Family Home Evening two months ago. Throughout his post-pubescent life, Parkin has also, like all male humans, been gripped by an intense, all-consuming desire to discharge his little factory, but has been unable to do so out of fear of incurring the wrath of God and suffering an eternity of agonizing punishment in the afterlife. My husband lied his way through all his interviews, etc., and was on his way to being bishop (and I have no doubt he would have achieved it--although he didn't want it)--but he is so charismatic, but all the while he was having sex with men on a regular basis--and going to church. Missionaries who were determined to rise to the level of AP or Zone Leader never confessed or acknowledged the practice of masturbation. And, I knew that the president purposefully kept them from leadership positions because of it.

Those young men, at the height of their hormonal development, made to feel shame and guilt for something that was natural and human.
On the morn, as mine companion did make his ablutions, I was stricken by a fearsome urge to vacate my bowels.
The parties at the Loading Dock continued, but we had enough packages and didnOt want any more. The following is a sincere and truthful account of my masturbation experience in the church.
No, I wasn’t perfect, but by both American and church standards my life genuinely reflected successful living of healthy social ideals.
I am now in my 50’s and I have learned that the church teaches many helpful things, but I have also learned by experience that in some areas it has adopted American cultural values and unfortunately some leaders speak as men who promote their own personal ideals as truths that are frankly damaging to members. After using the spiritual tests taught by Christ and comparing the spiritual fruits of masturbation abstinence to my experience masturbating, my personal experience bears testimony that the well meaning advice of LDS prophets on masturbation is false and damaging to physical, mental, and spiritual health. I remember at age five falling in love with a movie star on TV lamenting that I was just a little boy.
This demonstrates that it does not lead to a change of sexual orientation, or disease, or anything negative, but that it is developmentally appropriate and leads primarily to a healthy marriage bond in the majority of cases. Church leaders only began talking about it in the very late 1800’s when they told youth the same false medical information that was popular at the time - that it caused insanity. You can find the article published online on several websites by searching under Kip Eliason’s name. Many women who have marital problems solve them through masturbation as a therapeutic exercise.
One of the "apostles" (I don't remember who, but I want to say that it was Elder Perry) said that porn and masturbation were a major problem for many Bishops.
Every now and then, you would get a companion you liked, and could talk to, but most of the time, you clammed up. Like many young Mormon youth, Parkin was given a pamphlet by his bishop entitled “To Young Men Only” as a Deacon at the age of 12.
Thus, the liars rise to the top of the church, while those with strong convictions of honesty get filtered out. I always knew that if I had my husband go talk to them, that they'd like my husband so much, they'd lay off my son. The church taught me how to lie, how to pretend that I "knew" it was true, when I really didn't know.
For that reason, these guilt-ridden young men labeled themselves as failures and would continue in the cycle of masturbation - guilt - etc.
I did it to the point were I could look straight into the eyes of my bishop (easy) or father (hard) and say that "I don't jerk off".
Rather than soil myself, I did burst into the bathing chamber and and cast myself upon the throne. And great was our mutual embarrassment when I did see that Elder Hande was holding mightily to his iron rod.
Most Little Factories need a Loading Dock nearby and most Loading Docks prefer to be close to a Little Factory. Many times their words have steered me right, but sometimes their doctrine has hurt me and my loved ones. Of course I knew that it was not alright to be sexual with someone besides your wife, but what he was telling me about my penis was just the opposite of my own beautiful experiences. Kip was a 4.0 student, Eagle Scout candidate, school track star and held up by his teachers at church and school as an ideal youth.
And the same kind of lying and deception followed them home and into their business dealings. Occasionally a Loading Dock would rather be by another Loading Dock, the same with Little Factories. It was a good run but reluctantly I will have to shut this Little Factory down and lock the doors. I had no idea about sexual intercourse, but the pleasure of my sexual feelings in my genitals instinctively were associated to marriage and love. To me, my penis and the pleasure I derived from stroking it while daydreaming of girls I loved and temple marriage was holy and special. In this way masturbation contributes to LDS family values by enriching marriage (LDS leaders have acknowledged repeatedly that a large percentage of LDS divorces are based on sexual unhappiness).
Now that you understand how it happens, plan to break the pattern through counter activities.
Missionaries are thousands of miles from home, surrounded by fellow Mormons, and unable to show any honesty at all. My husband has many good qualities and he never should have married, but the fact that he was able to fake so many people out in the church is very telling. Local Zoning Laws try to regulate these placements and much is discussed concerning this issue. The concept of inner voice or conscience is our way to confirm when church leaders are human and fallible.
Hopefully someday, Little Factories and Loading Docks can situate wherever they darn well feel like it. You can quickly be subjected to a habit, one that is not worthy, one that will leave you feeling depressed and feeling guilty. The point is that the church values conformity even if is only skin deep and superficial not honesty, and the church's standards and norms foster this environment of dishonesty.

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